


The Beast's Mate

by Shackleddamsel



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Supernatural Elements, Anal Sex, Anger, Angst, BL, Beast pairings, Break Up, Cheating, Gay Love, Gay Sex, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, OOC, Rape, VictUuri, Victophe, Violent Sex, Violent mating, Yaoi, Yurionice, beastality, mention of suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-20
Updated: 2018-02-16
Packaged: 2019-01-20 04:16:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 16
Words: 24,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12424836
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shackleddamsel/pseuds/Shackleddamsel
Summary: Victor Nikiforov had always dreamed of meeting his mate like his parents did. He knew that the chances were very slim that's why when he sensed his mate he was overjoyed. What he didn't realize was claiming him will be another challenge.





	1. The Scent

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoy this alternate universe I created.

Humans are on the top of the animal kingdom. Buried deep within each person is the essence of the beast. It manifest on physical appearance or even attitude. But on very rare occasions. The primal instinct that has been suppressed by evolution claws out of the person's being. And becomes uncontrollable. Unstable.

~~~

It was just a faint scent in the air and it's almost dissipating. But that's all it took for Victor Nikiforov to be running around looking for it, he was trying to chase that fading essence of his mate. He was sure of it; his mate is just around.

"Victor,” Christopher Giacometti called after him.

Damn it, he suddenly remembered. It was his debut on the professional ice skating competition he should be concentrating on that but here he was running around like a fool. He cleared his head as Chris approached him.

"Yakov has been looking for you. It's almost time." Chris looked at him with a raised brow. A silent question.

Victor shook his head dismissing the other guy's concern. How could he tell his boyfriend he was trying to find someone who might be his mate. 

They headed for the rink together while Victor was trying to calm his nerves.

Chris was thankful his performance was before Victor's. He would have time to observe him. He was concerned ever since he found him running earlier. Victor had always been attentive of his audience but today Chris felt that there's more to it. It's like the other man was looking for something or someone. Was he looking for someone earlier? 

His boyfriend just ended his performance with a bow and a wave at his fans when a young kid approached him while he was exiting the rink. The boy looked no more than seven years old and he offered Victor a bouquet of flowers. Chris could see even from a distance that he was shaken. He started to approach his partner when the man didn't move to accept the flowers. He looked sick to Chris.

What the hell is going on, he worried. 

As he neared the two of them, Victor kneeled on one knee to take the bouquet that the kid was handing to him. Victor looked ashen as he studied the child's face. Chris stopped a few feet from them and simply observe. His boyfriend visibly shook himself before smiling to the boy and thanking him. He would have to wait when they are alone to question the man.

Chris laughed out as Victor finished relaying what happened with him earlier in the day. He walked him back to his room after the competition. Sitting side by side on the sofa Victor told him everything.

Victor looked at him sharply. "Glad you're finding this hilarious," he snarled.

"Your fangs don't really scare me." He could see Victor's eyes turn gray like it did when he's angry. The wolf is near the surface, he thought. 

Chris tried to control himself before speaking to his boyfriend seriously. The guy seemed to be really bothered with the situation.

"You gotta be honest dog, you left quite a few broken hearts in your wake so I find this really ironic," Chris chided him lightly. 

He reached out to kiss him, comfort him. It was just a chaste kiss until Victor slipped his tongue between Chris' lips. He smiled into it when he remembered his lover's situation. 

The guy pushed him away and the offended look on his face broke his control and he laughed again.

"Damn you, pussycat!" 

"Hey dog, I gave up on pussies a long time ago." 

Chris gave Victor some time and he stayed quiet for a while just holding his partner's hand in his. 

After a while he asked him, "How old is he exactly?"

"I'm not sure. Eight? No more than ten."

He couldn't help but smile at the guy's predicament. Victor had always been easy-going so seeing him like that was really entertaining. It was not that he didn't understand how complicated this could get if Victor decided to pursue it.

Chris stood to go, "Oh well, let's discuss this some more later. I need to meet with Coach first."

He heard Victor spoke softly as he was about to open the door. "We're okay right?"

"Dog, we're not breaking up over this. It's not like you can go after him even if we do," he assured the other man. "You're not one for shota, are you?"

Finally Victor looked up to look at him. He could see he's a bit more calmer. His eyes had darkened again. That's good, Chris thought.

"I'm a wolf not a dog."

"Sure." He looked at him carefully and he could see he was still very shaken with the situation. "Vic, come on what are the chances you'll meet again?"

"My parents were mated you know. But it's very rare. I never really thought that I'll meet my mate. But why him. A boy dammit! Isn't mating nature's assurance of the survival of the species? Then why with another guy. A kid!!"

Chris kneeled in front of Victor and wrapped his arms around his partner in support.

~~~

Sixteen Years After.

"What the fuck do you mean that you're going to Japan?"

Victor could feel Chris' suppressed temper even through the phone. He couldn't really blame the guy. He sighed, "Chris please--"

"You said you're just going to be there to choreograph Mila and Yuri! Then what the hell happened?" 

He promised Chris a talk. They parted ways the year before but had been in touch regularly. And finally last month he agreed to fly to Europe to try and fix things. That was before he saw the video.

"Did you see the video I sent you?" That video, Victor thought desperately. It's the reason why he needed to break things up completely with Chris.

"What about it," Chris hissed through the phone.

He could picture Chris' feline features showing because of frustration. "It's him," he said vaguely.

"What do you mean him?" 

"That kid."

"Oh, I see." He heard Chris breath heavily, calming himself. "What are you planning to do?"

"I can't let him go this time. I need to get to my mate." 

"He was in the last GP finals, wasn't he? Didn't you approach him then?"

"I tried, but he was so frustrated with the results of the competition I didn't have the heart to do it."

Victor thought of the time he saw his mate again. He wasn't sure if it was him. He just felt a familiar sensation in his chest when they passed each other at the lobby of the hotel. But the strong pull he felt at the banquet confirmed it. He longed to claim him then but there was something about the guy that made him hold back.

"I understand. Keep me updated okay? I'm still your best friend. Don't cut me off." Chris' voice brought him back.

Victor ended the call and looked back at the video on his laptop that he had been watching. Yuuri Katsuki. He had grown. Victor played the video of Yuuri imitating one of his routine, Stammi Vicino. He wondered if Yuuri's ready for his mate.

~~~

Yuuri Katsuki couldn't believe the video of him performing Victor Nikiforov's routine was posted online. He turned off his phone after learning of it and hid himself in his room. He won't be able to show his face in public after that.

It had been over a week since then. He looked around his room and sighed. He would have to go out soon or his parents would be worried. They had been concerned ever since he returned from the last GP Finals. He remembered the last performance and buried his face in his pillow again.

It was a disappointing season to say the least. Yuuri was just done with his competition at that time and he just made a royal mess out of it. He struggled as he tried to calm himself. He hid himself in the washroom while he battled for control. The frustration he was feeling made it hard to keep the beast inside him under control. He could feel the beast trying to claw out of his skin. When everything was starting to get hazy someone kicked the door of the cubicle he was in.

"We don't need two Yuri's!" 

Yuri Plisetsky, the promising skater from Russia. It was a good thing Yuuri's control did not snap after that rude display or he would have broken the younger guy's neck.

He had been having trouble keeping the beast under control even on his best days and confronting him like that was not a good idea.

Lucky him, he mused as he forced himself to stand up and go out. Maybe to practice.

"Good thing you went out of your room," his sister Mari told him as he descended the stairs.

"I'm sorry about that."

"I know you need a lot of time but you should show your face even at mealtime."

He nodded in response as he went outside. When he opened the door he saw a familiar dog. 

Victor's? No that couldn't be, he was so amazed as he looked closely at the dog and saw the likeness to his previous pet and Victor's, the older skater he admires. 

His mother passed by the door just then and saw him staring at the animal. "Oh that's the pet of one of our guests. A foreigner. So handsome."

His head snapped with that. "Where is he?" He asked urgently.

"The bath."

He was already running even before his mother answered.

"It can't be true. It can't be true," he kept telling himself but as he entered the bath and saw a familiar figure.

"Yuuri!"


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys for waiting!! Here you go my dear rotten people. I really hope you enjoy this as much as I enjoy writing it!! Victor has his hands full with two Yuris!! Please don't forget to leave a KUDOS and a comment!!

Yuuri sat across the table in front of Victor as the older man eats a bowl of katsudon. This situation is awkward for him, this is the man he had been admiring ever since he was a little kid. Now he was sitting in front of Yuuri but the reason still confused him.

"Yuuri is there a problem," Victor prompted as he caught Yuuri staring hard at him

"No,no," he smiled nervously. "Continue to eat. I hope you enjoy your stay here."

Victor studied him for a few more seconds before resuming his meal.

Damn it, Yuuri thought. He barely kept a good front with his family and now Victor is here. He could feel his frustration building and that made it harder to breath. He fought to stay calm.

Victor saw as Yuuri tried to control himself by breathing deeply. He wondered quietly what's going on inside his head but kept the questions to himself and continued to eat. 

"Yuuri," Victor prompted. "It might be that you already have a plan for the season and I might be making a nuisance of myself. But I would really like to coach you. I believe I can help you make a come back."

"Uh, no, I really appreciate the offer," the guy answered timidly. "I'll be in your care." Yuuri bowed his head.

"That's amazing!" Victor reached for both Yuuri's hands and held them tightly in his.

He saw the younger man blushed with the action. Oh man, he mused, I'm in trouble if you keep showing that face.

For the next two weeks Victor learned of Yuuri's routine and made subtle changes in preparation for the training. It was also to help Yuuri lose the extra weight he had gained. Victor accompanied him in his morning runs to keep a close eye on his activities. 

More than two weeks had passed since Victor arrived in Hasetsu but he didn't feel any closer to Yuuri. The younger man still kept to himself. He was fidgety with Victor most of the time. It made it harder for Victor to approach him on an emotional level. 

The distance felt frustrating to him, it felt unnatural to be treated like this by his mate.

On one of their run they slowed down to walking along the beach next to each other.

"Yuuri, did you ever have a girlfriend?" He couldn't help asking anymore.

"Huh?" The other guy was obviously confused with the sudden personal question.

"Or boyfriend?" Victor teased.

"What?" Yuuri blushed even more at that.

He chuckled softly at Yuuri's embarrassment. But all of a sudden the guy's eyes changed and he saw a reddish glint on them. The same murderous look he saw last time at the banquet.

He remembered that night clearly. He was having second thoughts about being Yuuri's mate. He didn't see any indication that the younger skater felt the same pull as he did. That doubt only lasted until after the banquet when he forced himself to approach a drank Yuuri, while the guy was on his way back to his hotel room. That's when he met the beast face to face for the first time. 

"I don't have anyone like that," Yuuri's answer brought him back from the memory. The other man averted his gaze and resumed walking, leaving Victor behind.

It's a freaking Jekyll and Hyde with you, isn't it?, Victor mused to himself.

Yuuri looked back and staring at him questioningly, "Did you say something?"

"Nope. None at all," with that he jogged to catch up to his mate.

Yuuri ran faster though to distance himself from Victor. He could feel part of his lower teeth extending to form tusks because of the tension from his new coach's questions. He fought to control the beast but it was hard. With the simple mention of girlfriend the memories from the last GP finals and his break up with Sara Crispino right after that came crashing back. Stop thinking about it, he scolded himself. 

He let the ocean air calm him and as his tusks reverted back to normal teeth he slowed down to let Victor catch up to him.

He turned to him, "Just be there, that's good enough."

He saw Victor was caught off guard with what he said but he seemed pleased with it. His coach didn't answer anymore just smiled back at him and gave him a nod.

~~~

"Victor you promised you will choreograph my debut performance! And then you just left!"

Yuuri looked as Victor tried to speak with his visitor. Yuri Plisetsky, what the hell is the younger skater doing in Japan, he thought. He massaged his temple, he could feel a headache coming. 

They were just done doing a few exercises on the ice when the younger Russian skater barged in on the rink with his suitcase and an angry scowl.

The last thing Yuuri needed was more people around him. It made it harder to keep his temper in check. If he remembered anything about the younger skater it was that he was a pain in the ass.

He looked up as Victor tried to apologize and explain to Plisetsky the situation.

"I'm coaching Yuuri," Victor explained again.

"But you promised! And I'm holding you to that promise," Plisetsky insisted.

Yuuri wondered when they're going to be done with this back and forth play when Victor looked at him. He didn't like that smile that slowly formed on the man's face.

Damn it, he could smell trouble.

"Okay Yuri. You win, I'll choreograph you if you win against Yuuri Katsuki," Victor announced, "on a competition."

"What!?" The two Yuris shouted in surprise at the same time.

"Hey," Plisetsky protested. "Not fair! You promised me first."

"Are you scared you won't win?" Victor challenged Yuri Plisetsky. He knew the guy couldn't let go of a dare like that.

"Screw you! We're going back to Russia together when I win!" 

"Yuuri?"

Screw both of them, Yuuri thought. They could both leave for all he cared. His life would definitely be a bit more quiet. But when he remembered Victor teasing the other Yuri, he felt uncomfortable. Something twisted in his chest and he didn't like it.

Victor watched as Yuuri tried to decide what he wanted to do. But when the guy looked up to at him then glanced at Yuri, he saw the danger then. His mate assessed Yuri with those reddish eyes. For a moment there Victor was afraid he put his Russian junior in danger.

"Okay, let's do it," Yuuri finally answered. Victor saw as his pupils turned black again.

"Okay," he put on a cheerful facade as he worry for his mate. He put his arm around Yuuri's shoulder and pulled him close. Damn, so the beast is also territorial, he shook his head in disbelief. He knew he would have his hands full with this two. But more so with his mate.

~~~

Victor was showing the two Yuri's the program he choreographed. They would be using it for the competition he had set up for them and whoever wins would get what he wanted from Victor.

Yuuri was watching outside the rink as Victor performed what he called the two interpretation of love. Agape, selfless love and Eros, sexual love. 

The steps of the first one sat well with Yuuri's usual performances, he would like to try that on his own. Even the music soothed him. But as Victor moved to the next one and started a performance that's more sensual than the former, Yuuri started to hear pounding inside his own head. He could feel the beast fighting its way out of his consciousness. 

"Hey, pig!" He heard Plisetsky called but the voice sounded far away. 

"Yuuri." That's Victor's voice. He tries to hold on to that and fought to keep his head.

"Yuuri, is everything okay?" Victor asked. 

Yuuri finally lifted his head to see that Victor is already in front of him with both hands on each of his shoulders. 

"Sorry about that," he offered as he tried to clear his thinking.

"Anxiety attacks? Is that what's wrong with you," the younger Yuri prompted. 

"No," he snapped at them.

"We can take a break," Victor offered.

"I said I'm fine."

Victor looked closely at his mate, he couldn't inquire deeper as to what happened in front of his junior. He knew how sharp Yuri could be even for his age and he didn't want whatever it was that Yuuri was keeping, exposed if he was not yet ready.

He sighed and continued. "Okay then, tell me what you think about the two programs?"

"It's great! I'll start practicing the second one. I'm definitely more sexual than the pig," Yuri smirked at Yuuri.

"Actually you'll be performing the first one," Victor announced, "and you Yuuri will be doing the second one."

Victor could see the shock on both their faces and when he saw Yuri was about to protest be held up his hand to stop him.

"What's good about letting you do what you usually do. For both of you to grow step out of your comfort zone." Victor flashed at them his innocent smile.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's finally unfolding!!! I hope this intrigues you to keep reading and wait for more updates!! Victuuri!

Yuuri watched from the edge of the rink as Yuri Plisetsky practice the program that Victor gave him. The young Russian protégé was determined to beat him and drag Victor back to their country. He looked so beautiful gliding on the ice. Each spin, each jump, was a testament to years of training. Yuri Plisetsky on the ice was very elegant. But not so off of it.

Yuuri couldn't help but smile as he remembered the younger skater's first time to eat a bowl of katsudon. How could he forget his amazed expression? And how he just earned a new nickname. His family decided it would be too confusing to have to two Yuris in the house and decided to call their guest Yurio.

Yuuri continued to watch as Yurio prepared for a jump. "Feline," he muttered to himself as he studied Yurio's graceful built.

"Yes he's a cat. The wilder version though," Victor said as he stepped next to him.

"And you're a dog," Yuuri teased.

"Hey. It's wolf, okay? Have some respect." Victor tried to act affronted but Yuuri could tell he's not.

He just shook his head at the other guy's antics.

"And you're a domesticated animal, I think," Victor said as he studied him.

"Am I?"

Victor would have questioned him further but Yurio called him to the rink.

"Victor get over here and show me that spin again," Yurio demanded.

Yuuri sighed in relief. He didn't mean to answer like that at all but people had been making that assumption since he was a kid. Being in a family like his where people were born with the essence of domesticated animals, others had expected it would always be the same.

Yuuri was pretty sure his parents thought the same until he was born and they encountered violent episodes from him. He couldn't control his beast at all.

His thoughts was interrupted by Victor's voice, who was calling him to join them. "I should really concentrate, " he scolded himself.

~~~

As the week went by the pressure of the coming competition started to take its toll on the two Yuris. Especially when the event was announced to the public and the attention increased. 

Yuri Plisetsky for his part had been having a hard time connecting to the feel of the program he was assigned with. He drifted away from company at the onsen and even during practice at the rink due to frustration. 

Yuuri knew that Yurio took a different route for his morning run on purpose so he was surprised to see the other skater sitting on the beach one morning. As he approached Yurio he noticed that the guy seemed to be on deep thought as he didn't even felt Yuuri's presence. 

"Yurio," he called as he tap the shoulder of the younger guy from the back.

He might had spooked Yurio because the next thing he knew was the stinging sensation on his arm before he saw deep scratches. Yurio was crouching defensively and he could see his extended nails with blood dripping from the tips.

Next thing Yuuri knew was the red haze and the pounding in his head as his tusks formed and the beast took over.

~~~

Victor was following Yuuri's morning route to catch up on his mate when he heard some commotion and a suppressed growl near the beach. He sprinted to where he could see Yuuri attacking Yurio, his hands around the smaller guy's neck. Yurio was trying to claw his way out of Yuuri's grip as the Japanese skater pressed him to the sand with his body poised on top of him.

Victor immediately pulled Yuuri off of Yurio by the waist. But since his mate was not in control it was hard to restrain him. Yuuri tried to escape Victor's restraining arms and tried to reach for the younger skater again who was frozen in fear.

"Run!" Victor shouted at Yurio when it didn't seem like he won't move in his own. 

Yurio snapped in attention at the sound of Victor's voice and ran away.

"Dammit, Yuuri!" Victor shouted.

He could feel blood dripping from his arms where Yuuri was scratching him trying to escape from his embrace. He wouldn't last long against his trashing mate and he knew it would only be a matter of time before he escaped. So he willed the essence of the grey wolf in him and with his long canines bit deep into Yuuri's shoulder. Yuuri's growl because of the pain was deafening. Victor snarled back without releasing his mate's shoulder. They struggled for a few more minutes until he felt Yuuri's beast recoil. The trashing stopped and Yuuri sagged unconscious in his arms.

Victor was breathing hard as he laid Yuuri down on the sand to try and control himself as well. The taste of his mate's blood was making crazy. His own beast was roaring and pushing him to claim his mate, to show the other beast he belonged to the wolf. He closed his eyes briefly as the adrenaline from the struggle fueled his lust.

"Fuck, I don't need this right now!" He looked at the vulnerable form of Yuuri and the concern for his mate's safety won out.

~~~

"And now he called," Chris' sarcastic answer when he picked up the phone.

"Sorry about that Chris." Victor massaged his temple as he talked.

"Hey dog, what's going on?" Chris sensed the tension in the other guy's voice.

"This is more complicated than I have expected."

"What? Babysitting duties not fruitful? I've heard Plisetsky is also there."

"Yes," Victor confirmed. "They had a little trouble here earlier. I'm not sure of the details yet but I needed to stop Yuuri from seriously hurting him. Yuuri have some anger management issues. If you get what I mean."

"Wait! He's unstable?" Chris sounded surprised and worried.

"Yes."

"Okay then. But he's a pig right? So how unstable can he get? They're domestic animals."

"You know a grey wolf's main prey?" Victor prompted.

"Fuck!" He heard the guy muttered.

"Yes that's right Chris, I'm fucked because I'm my mates natural predator."

~~~

It had been more than a day and Yuuri was still unconscious. Yurio tried to ask his sister Mari about Yuuri's condition but she managed to brush him off.

"Its not my story to tell, Yurio. Ask Yuuri himself when he wakes up."

He spent most of the day at the rink, practicing. The program Agape was challenging with most of the jumps concentrated on the second half and he was barely finishing the last spin. He needed to build more stamina.

He was resting at the side of the rink when he heard someone approaching and looked up to see Yuuri already in his skates.

"I'm sorry about yesterday," he said to Yurio when he stood beside him.

"No, I attacked you."

"And I shouldn't have sneaked up on you," Yuuri countered.

Yurio saw the other guy's arm was still bandaged. "How's your wound?"

"It's healing fast. Don't worry about it. What about the marks around your neck," Yuuri gestured at his bruised skin.

"Fading," Yurio shrugged. "What about scars?"

"I never have scars."

"Never?"

"Never."

"Oh well, perks of being a pig," he teased.

The older guy seemed to be calmer and more in control now to Yurio so he gave in to curiosity.

"What exactly happened to you?"

But instead if getting an answer Yuuri just stepped on the ice and gestured for him follow.

"Teach me that triple Salchow. I never really executed that properly."

"You're avoiding the question" Yurio snapped.

"If you win against me. I'll answer all your questions."

"Promise?" 

"Sure." Yuuri confirmed.

~~~

"Damn it, pig," Yurio panted. "At this rate you will never perfect this by the competition."

"Shut up," Yuuri snapped as he laid on one of the benches trying to catch his breath.

They had practice all afternoon but he still couldn't complete the triple Salchow. 

"Hey why are you guys excluding me?" Victor complained as he entered the locker room.

"Don't be so loud," Yuuri ordered. He had his eyes close as he tried to calm himself and gauge the beast.

"What? I just came to tell you all my costumes arrived and you can choose from them."

"Wait, all?" Yurio asked doubtfully.

"Yes, all."

"All?" Yuuri got up from the bench.

"Yes everything from the time I started competing professionally. Because I'm not sure which one you'll prefer."

"And where do you think you'll put all of that?" Yuuri prompted.

"I see. Yeah that might be a problem huh?" 

Yurio was shaking his head incredulously as he left them.

~~~

Germany

Chris approached the the two familiar figure that was sitting outside a restaurant.

"Sara Crispino? It's been a long time," he greeted them as he occupied a chair opposite the siblings.

"Christophe, what are you doing here?" Sara smiled warmly at him.

"I've met with Josef before continuing with my travels."

"We're also travelling before the start of the season. Right, Mickey?" She turned to her brother who scowled at Chris.

"Where's your dog Giacometti?" Michele Crispino spat at him.

"Victor's in Japan coaching Yuuri Katsuki," he explained mildly. He was confused at Michele's obvious irritation.

Sara looked at him apologetically. "So it's true. We've heard rumors. But Yuuri never give details when I speak with him."

"You still talk to him?" Michele seemed surprised with this news from his sister. "You already broke up why still call him?"

"Wait you were with Yuuri? I didn't know that." Chris never heard about it.

"We're friends. There's no problem calling from time to time." Sara explained blushing furiously.

"They were together more than two years. But broke up at the last GP finals. Right after the banquet," the brother relayed angrily.

"The day after the banquet," Sara countered.

"It's still the same! So I don't know why you're still calling him!" Michele growled back.

Chris watched the display between siblings while he processed this information about Yuuri Katsuki. He outright laughed when Sara slapped his brother's arm to silence him. But he still worried about what's going on with Victor and his mate.

~~~

"Hold on, you two. I'll just take this call from Chris," Victor shouted back in the room where the two Yuris were choosing costumes for their competition. 

He closed the door behind him as he answered the phone. "Hey, Chris."

"What exactly happened on the banquet last GP finals, Victor? And don't tell me none. I spoke with Sara Crispino and his brother."


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys I changed the warning and the tagging so please please please check them before continuing! No complaining after okay? You've been warned. 
> 
> I've been going over and over this chapter before I post it but here you go!! Tell me what you think about Victor!

Grand Prix Banquet

Victor saw Yuuri Katsuki left the venue, and he worried as the Japanese skater seemed unsteady on his feet and so he decided to follow him. He kept a safe distance as he followed Yuuri on the guy's way back to his hotel room. His hunting instinct was starting to come alive just a few minutes after he left the banquet. And the thought that this guy might be his mate was fuelling his lust and gave him a very uncomfortable hard on.

He started to doubt the idea of Yuuri Katsuki being his mate because of the other guy's lack of reaction to his presence, but the mere sight of the younger skater made him hot all over. All of his predatory instinct were on high alert. Not even Chris Giacometti inspired that kind of reaction from him, and they had been lovers for years.

He saw Yuuri stopped a few doors before his room and Victor could see him leaning his forehead against a wall. He approached when the guy punched the wall in obvious frustration.

"Yuuri?" Victor called out as he carefully approached him.

When Yuuri turned, Victor saw his eyes had turned a reddish color and what looked like fangs formed from his lower teeth. 

He growled as he fully faced Victor. He just had enough time to react as Yuuri launched himself at him and Victor's back hit the other wall hard. Both of his hands were caught between them. He pushed Yuuri off of him as the guy tried to reach for his neck with those sharp teeth. 

He managed to get his hand around Yuuri's neck, and his hold of Victor weakened as he tightened his fingers on the guy's neck. He was able to push him completely off and against the other wall. He bared his own canines and snarled back at Yuuri. 

They glared at each other for what seemed like a long time, and Victor growled at Yuuri again in a display of dominance. Yuuri cowered a little, and the extended teeth slowly reverted to normal. The obvious retreat fueled Victor's beast further as his lust took over his senses and he claimed Yuuri's lips.

Yuuri tried to resist, but Victor tightened his hold on the guy's neck as a silent threat. He lifted his face enough to look Yuuri in the eyes. He still had that reddish murderous glare, but he stopped struggling. They both knew Victor could just snap his neck. He stared harder at Yuuri letting him see the reflection of the grey wolf in his eyes which he knew had turned a bluish gray.

When the younger skater closed his eyes, Victor knew he won. He kissed him again, and this time Yuuri opened his lips to let his tongue in. He could feel his beast's triumph as he started to devour his prey. 

He somehow managed to get them inside Yuuri's hotel room without breaking the kiss. He pushed Yuuri down on the floor just a few steps from the door. He didn't bother with the buttons of his mate's clothes as he ripped them off of him. He positioned himself between Yuuri's legs and pushed his hard on against Yuuri's. He could feel Yuuri's cock responding to the friction, but he started to struggle again.

"Stop! I don't want this," he growled at Victor as he tried to push him off.

Victor immobilized him with his weight and both his hands on Yuuri's shoulder pushing him down. He could feel his long sharp nails wounding the other guy's skin, but he was far from caring. 

Yuuri was trying to squeeze him between his legs, preventing him from moving, so he moved his right hand around his neck again with his left hand holding down one if his legs to give him more space. Yuuri's hands moved to wrap around his wrist as he stopped himself from completely strangling him to gain dominance.

He forced his hardened cock into Yuuri's hole, but the guy's too tight. Even the head won't fit. He took a deep breath to calm himself but his mate squirmed, and his control snapped. He rammed his cock into the guy's entrance without thought, and Yuuri screamed in pain. He withdrew a little, and he saw blood from where they were joined, and more blood started to show around Yuuri's neck where his nails had grazed, even on his thighs.

But he was too far into the mating to stop, and his hips continued to thrust violently into Yuuri. After a few minutes, he felt Yuuri meeting his thrust. He looked up to see the guy's eyes glared at him with pure hatred but his body was betraying him. Victor won his mate. The thought of the beast's surrender pushed him near his orgasm as felt Yuuri shudder with his release; he pumped his seed into him. He felt his fangs itched to dig into his mate's flesh but he bit his arm instead at the last second and he collapsed on top of Yuuri.

His canines returned to normal as his nails did but who could still see the traces of blood on his fingertips and the taste of his own blood on his mouth. He slowly pulled out his cock from Yuuri and he realized his mate was unconscious. The younger skater was full of wounds, scratches and Victor's own cock was smeared with blood from where he forced his entry.

"Damn it! What have I done?" He cried as he continued to look at his mate's body.

He cleaned Yuuri and carefully laid him to the bed. The guy didn't even stir but Victor was comforted by Yuuri's deep and regular breathing.

He sat beside him on the bed as he remembered what happened. The whole thing was so primal, so out of control and no amount of stories from his parents and other mated friends prepared him for the murderous lust that overcame him. He hurt his mate. He practically raped him. He covered his face with both his hands as he sobbed. 

"How could I face him after this?"

~~~

Present time. Hasetsu, Japan.

"You claimed him without consent?" Chris' outraged voice sounded on the other line. Victor couldn't even confirm it. But that's exactly what he did. "That's a crime! You realize that right? If Katsuki filed a case against you, you'll lose him. You won't even be allowed near him."

"I know! That's exactly why I left that night. Because I know that if I asked him to be my mate after what happened he'll outright refuse and I'll lose my chance," Victor explained. Ever since that night he had been tortured with thoughts of completely losing Yuuri.

"You probably lost every chances when he said stop and you ignored it," Chris yelled.

"You don't understand! It was scary, Chris. It's like it wasn't me. Like I'm watching through my eyes but I don't have any control," he cried desperately. He felt like a monster that night. Each pained moan and whimper from Yuuri fueled him further to thrust harder, to fill his mate with his essence.

He heard the other guy sighed before speaking. "What do you plan to do then? Get him to trust you first? Then you'll spring this news?" Chris' voice full of sarcasm.

"If I can help it he won't even find out about that night." Victor never thought that Yuuri would forget that night. He never expected that his mate would welcome him normally when he showed up in Hasetsu. It came as a surprise for him that Yuuri didn't confront him about the incident at al.

"I doubt that. Sara saw you followed Yuuri that night! If she found out you're Katsuki's mate it's possible she'll figure out something happened that night."

"Fuck!" Victor was hoping that there would be no need to tell Yuuri about that night if he could make him fall for him and agree to be his mate. "What exactly did they tell you about that night?"

"Michele said that when they met Yuuri the following day he reacted violently to Sara's touch and there's something about Yuuri's scent changing. Like another scent intertwined with his," the other guy relayed.

This would get out of hand, Victor thought, if he doesn't handle it properly.

"Thank you, Chris. I'll call you again."

"Victor, be careful how you go about telling Katsuki about this. It might cause you to lose him for good," Chris warned.

"I know." He ended the call with that. 

Victor knew the law against unwanted mating. If the other half didn't consent properly to the mating or was forced, then it would be a crime and he would be ordered to leave Yuuri and never approach him again. His chest ached at the thought of having to leave Yuuri's side. He understood this is his fault but the world be damned, he would not leave his mate.

"Victor, can you come here for a second?" He heard Yuuri called from inside. 

"Yes," he answered as he took a deep breath before stepping back inside the house. He was determined to keep his mate even if it meant breaking the law.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Victor!!! Whhhhyyyyy!? Don't forget to click that heart button!! See you next week!!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm posting this early because I know I'll be busy in the coming days. I struggled with writing this part because I'm so excited for the Hasetsu on Ice competition and what will happen after. I needed to stop myself from being crazy and writing that chapter before this.XD

"Hey," Yurio called to Yuuri as they were pouring out all of the costumes Victor brought from Russia. "I heard Sara Crispino dumped you."  
Victor who was beside them rubbing Maccachin saw Yuuri was taken aback by the question but he schooled his features immediately to hide it.   
"I didn't know you gossip about me," Yuuri was trying to tease his way out.  
"Did she learn you're a badass?" Yurio persisted.  
"What?"  
"I know you look out of it most of the time but the other day you kicked my ass. Definitely badass." Victor saw reluctant admiration in Yurio as the younger skater continued to pry Yuuri.  
Yuuri was just shaking his head at Yurio."I honestly don't remember what happened."  
Victor turned sharply to his mate. “What do you mean?" He asked before Yurio could react.  
"Whenever I have this, well, episodes," he smiled apologetically at the term, "I wake up not remembering anything. I just know it happened because I'll be sore all over but the wounds, if there's any, heal fast."  
"Woah," Yurio looked so amazed by this information. He leaned closer to the other skater. "Wait, so you don't remember Victor stopping you?"  
"He stopped me?" Victor met Yuuri's doubtful gaze and for a moment he could had sworn his mate's eyes turned red for a while. "Mari didn't tell me about that," he said carefully before he averted his gaze back to the costumes they were looking at.  
"Yurio, you should go to your room now. Early day tomorrow," Victor wanted to stop his junior from further questions. He was afraid it would trigger Yuuri if they unknowingly stepped on a sensitive topic.  
Yuuri also stood to leave as Yurio grumbled back to the room he would be using while staying in Hasetsu.   
"Yuuri, please let's talk about this," he pleaded with his mate. He could see the tension from Yuuri's back as he stopped just before the door.  
"How did you stop me? That's what I want to know."  
"Yuuri please," Victor was desperate to calm his mate down. This was the worst possible question he could ask. The answer if he was honest would reveal too much.  
"If you're not ready to tell me anything then let's not talk for now," with that Yuuri left him.  
~~~  
The open air outside helped to calm Yuuri’s nerves and probably delayed another appearance of the beast. But the revelation that Victor was able so somehow overpower him and control him was really bothering. It would imply that Victor had some influence on his essence. The only way that’s possible was if he had sworn allegiance, he dismissed that. They were not the same species. So the only other option was that they were mates. Many questions were circling inside his head a lot of them could be answered by Victor but he refused to have that conversation now. He needed to concentrate on the competition. It would decide whether Victor would stay or not.  
“I’m not even sure I want him to stay,” he mumbled to himself. But as he said it, he felt an unfamiliar pinch in his chest. As he pondered on these thoughts he arrived at the ice skating rink.   
“Hey. Isn’t it a bit late even for you?” Yuko was cleaning and arranging the skates when he found her.   
It had been Yuuri’s habit to stop by the rink after closing time to do some practice. Being on the ice had always calmed him and kept him grounded. He smiled at Yuko who had always welcomed him on these occasions. “Needed to get away,” he simply said.  
His childhood friend just nodded at this and he made his way to the rink. For some reason while he was on the ice, he could let go. He didn’t need as much control to rein in the beast inside him. It was like they were in sync for once instead of constantly fighting for control. Each glide, each turn, he could feel the wild boar in him following his steps. It was dancing with him on the ice. He could feel its essence covering him as he let the flow of the steps took him around the rink.  
Yuuri went through the program a few times more but he still felt like there was something missing to it. Something essential he was missing on the execution and he knew where to find it. He needed to make sure Victor stayed with him until he could have all the answers.  
~~~  
“Your mate hasn’t killed you yet?” Chris asked playfully when Victor called him.  
“I didn’t call to hear your smart asides, Chris.”  
“Why did you call then?” Victor could hear loud music and conversation in the background.  
“You seemed busy. I’ll callback another time.”  
“Hey,” he heard Chris excusing himself and after a few minutes it seemed like Chris moved away from wherever he was because it was quieter now. “Okay dear, I’m all yours.”  
“You didn’t have to do that,” he hated the idea that he was putting Chris out by calling him. Even before they broke up he always made a point not to interrupt with Chris’ work and the guy did the same for him. “Thinking back we never really needed each other. We normally just keep out of each other’s way,” Victor thought that was a very depressing realization of his relationship with Chris.  
“What are you being somber about now?”  
“I just thought that I never experienced this crippling need before with you. It’s overwhelming,” he confided desperately. He thought it would be awkward to tell all of this to his previous lover but it felt natural to pour his heart out to the guy. It was probably because of their long friendship and the fact that they never felt this desperate for each other.   
“Well, there’s really no need to tell me that I don’t inspire passion in you, you miserable dog,” he heard Chris chuckled. “We’re not like that Victor. We don’t work like that, so don’t sweat it okay?” Chris continued when he didn’t answer. “So tell me what happened?”  
“It’s just that Yuuri is starting to catch on.”  
“He learned about what happened last GP finals?”  
“No,” he said forcefully. “No, not that, definitely not that,” he repeated a bit calmer. “Fuck! Thank God it’s not that.”  
Chris could hear the relief on Victor’s voice. “Hey, I’m sure everything will turn out fine. You just have to be very careful.” He knew how much Victor wanted to be able to claim his mate and finally be with him. It was hard for him to see his best friend like this. They had been together half of their life competing against each other and planning their life after retirement. But he had always known that the knowledge of Victor’s mate was getting harder and harder to ignore as the years passed by. So it didn’t come as a surprise when they eventually drifted apart. Chris was just happy for Victor when he announced he would finally go to his mate and now this.   
"I'm so scared at the thought of Yuuri finding out what happened. But at the same time I feel so guilty about lying and hiding about this." Victor had never felt so lost before not even as a young skater competing with older, more experienced ones in the big arenas.  
"I really wish I can just take you away Victor so that you don't have to go through all of this."  
"Don't get me wrong Chris, I don't regret anything. This isn't just about being mates anymore. You should see him. He's amazing, so strong yet vulnerable at the same time. Everything about him calls to the predatory and protective instincts that I have. I want him to succeed but I want to be there when he falls. God, this sounds so sappy."  
"Yeah it is. But I'm so happy for you still," Victor heard the smile on Chris' voice.  
"Thanks. It's comforting to know I have you as a fall back plan."  
"Hey what does that mean?"  
Victor just laughed but didn't elaborate further. "I should hang up now. It'll be a big day tomorrow."  
"Vic, this plan that you have, this competition, what happens if Yuuri loses?"  
"Then we’ll be finding out how much of a mate I am to him."  
~~~  
Yuuri entered their house past midnight after practicing as much as he could for the upcoming competition. He found the piece of the program he was looking for and he was satisfied about it so far but he knew how talented Yurio was as well. He was dreading the coming day but he already did everything there was to do to be prepared.  
"You're so late," Yuuri almost jumped at Victor's voice he was hoping not to have to face him until the competition. He didn't speak because he didn't know if there was anything to say. Victor was not willing to be honest to him earlier about what he knew.  
"You're really not going to speak to me at all?" He could hear the sadness in the guy's voice, it was trembling.  
"Let's not talk for now. We're not sure if you'll be staying anyway. I don't have to deal with this if you're leaving. If I win then we'll talk."  
"Yuuri, I can't believe you can be so cruel."  
He looked up to see Victor's eyes boring at him. He could see the hurt there but he felt so betrayed too that Victor was hiding things from him. "Yes, I could be. You might all treat me like a wounded animal and maybe I am. But don't forget that when I'm cornered I'll attack. I'll attack first." He left Victor without waiting for him to answer and headed to his room. His whole body was shaking as he fought down the essence of the beast that was wanting to claw Victor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so hurt for Victor but I understand Yuuri as well. I'm torn. What about you guys?


	6. Hasetsu on Ice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly hope I was able to capture at least a bit of the beauty of this two performances.

"Yuuri", Victor approached the younger man as he was preparing for the competition on the locker area.

"Don't, please," Yuuri sighed before looking up to him. "Let me get through this first and I promise you we will talk." 

"Okay, I'll do that," Victor turned and walk away. "Yurio, it's time. Come on." His Russian junior walked out to the rink with him after giving Yuuri a curious glance.

The side of the rink was already filled with people when they entered. 'This is it,' Victor thought. He worried about Yuuri's performance, if he would purposely sabotage his program or forfeit altogether. He breathed deeply as Yurio stepped on the ice. 'Calm yourself. He said to wait and that's what I'll do.'

He saw Yuuri approach from the locker room as Yurio waived at the audience and the music started.

-On Love, Agape-

Yuri Plisetsky stepped on the ice in a see through white ensemble. He bowed his head as the music started. He conjured the image of his grandfather in his head, his ultimate presentation of Agape. Selfless love. His grandpa was always proud with every new step he took. He just wished he could see this too. 'It's a new program, Grandpa.'

He proceeded with the step sequence and the spin and he felt the spirit of the cub he once was, taking its own step on the ice. His grandfather was prancing next to him, watchful and protective. He could feel the essence of his beast on the ice gliding with him but impatient as he approached his first jump. He lost his grandfather's image as he attacked each jump. He could feel the steps getting harried, the impatience was building up. Another jump, then another spin, a combination and he screamed inside as he reached the end of the program. He just wanted it to be over already. 'This sucks. I'm so much better than this.'

-On Love, Eros-

As the sensual music started, Yuuri focused on Victor. His mate was watching him. 'This is it. This will decide where we go from here.' But Yuuri was still confused with where he would want to take it as well. 

He was confused with the program at first, he wasn't outgoing, he was not promiscuous in anyway. The program was about seduction, and he had absolutely no clue how to do that. But the idea of seducing his mate to keep him by his side appealed to the primal instinct in him. Victor was his and no one could take him away from Yuuri. Yuuri went on his first quad, but he spun out. He breathed deeply as he proceeded to the step sequence. Victor lied to him but he chose to be with Yuuri. This conflicting thoughts guided him as he attacked the next quad-triple combination with ease. All inhibitions was gone as he did his final confirmation spin. His final thought as the music ended , 'Victor's mine.'

~~~

Yurio left as Yuuri made his final spin. He knew what the results would be. That performance that Yuuri gave, he could not compete with it with his current program. He would have to improve and he would.

He was back in the locker room packing his things when the Japanese skater found him.

"You're leaving?" The guy had a confuse look on as he saw Yurio's luggage. "Why? You're not waiting for the decision?"

He stood to approach Yuuri and stopped right in front of the other guy. "You should have seen yourself out there. Yuuri, you were magnificent. That performance? It's … you. That's the real you and it's amazing." Yurio looked him in the eyes trying to find any trace of the wild beast but at the moment he could not find it. It was caged again and he thought that was such a shame. It was a beautiful wild spirit. "You're not supposed to be tamed, Yuuri. You're wild and that's okay. I could see the spirit of the beast in tune with you whenever you're on the ice. What you need is not control but acceptance. And I just hope Victor sees what I see. You'll be such a monster when you finally accepts that you'll never be normal and that there's no reason to." 

"Yurio."

"I'll be stronger to take you on, pig. Don't get that wrong. I'll be waiting on a bigger stage. And I'll be waiting for the real you there. You don't have to be caged because everything about you screams wild. And honestly that's the best thing about you."

"That got to be the nicest thing you said to me. And I just hope that I can live up to it." Yuuri breathed deeply and turned back to the younger guy. "You don't know what I can do when I let the beast out. Yurio, it's not a pretty scene." He reached up to touch Yurio's neck, traced it as a reminder of what happened last time. "What happened to you, that's… you're lucky Victor was there. Worse things had happened when I'm not fully in control."

"You're afraid of the beast but you are the beast. Don't talk like it's separate from you." Yurio was getting irritated with Yuuri's calm resignation. He sighed and turned back to packing. "Fix yourself so I can kick your butt on the GP finals. I'll be waiting."

~~~

The two Yuris left the ice rink right after the performance leaving Victor to deal with the fans and the media. Yurio left the same day to travel back to Russia and continue his training with his coach Yakov. 

Yuuri's conversation with the guy left him bothered and confused. He took to spending time alone thinking, he refrained from any interaction with his family even Victor. He knew his mate was expecting something from him. He could feel his scrutinizing look whenever they bumped into each other at the house but he always averted his gaze. Yuuri knew he was being unfair. He promised the guy a serious talk after the competition but he still had no real path in mind when it came to Victor. 'Where do I go from here? Or better yet, where do we go?'

He was sitting on the side of the beach looking at the waves crashing at the shore. The violent sea definitely reflected his thoughts. He felt someone approaching and he was amazed that he could tell it's Victor without checking. He could feel his overpowering aura but at the same time the protective and possessive quality of it towards him. 'His mate,' he played the word in his mind. It felt foreign to him, different but right. It's just right.

He stood up to face Victor. They needed to talk and he had been procrastinating but they were not going anywhere like this.

"Do you even want me here?" Victor felt so frustrated that once again his mate had closed out from him. "You gave everything you've got to win, but do you even want me to stay?"

Yuuri didn't answer but turned away from Victor to look at the sea. After a sigh he said, "I do want you here. Its a confusing feeling and everything is so new and so strong. I can't find my bearings but in the middle of all this emotions I do know that I don't want you to go."

"Oh God, Yuuri," Victor wasn't able to contain it anymore and dashed to his mate to embrace him from the back.

Yuuri flinched but after he got accustomed to Victor's touch he relaxed and gripped his mate's wrist. He could feel Victor's pulse and it calmed him further. This was totally different from what he had with Sara, it wasn't even close to that. It couldn't be compared to even a portion of what he was feeling with Victor. It frightened him in its proportion, it could drown them both but at that moment with Victor holding on to him, he didn't care. 

The relief that Victor felt with Yuuri's acceptance was like being free from a heavy burden he had been carrying for years. Finally they were going forward together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That heart button please. XD


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry for not updating sooner I was sick but I'll make sure to make up for it by updating twice this week so watch out for it!!

"Wait, I'm sorry?" Yuuri gaped at Victor. He was sure he didn't hear what the other guy said properly.

"You heard me. You'll help create your free program."

They were back at the Ice Castle rink to plan Yuuri's free program. In a few months the season would start. Victor promised to help with Yuuri's return into active competition but helping with the program sounded troublesome.

"Why can't you just choreograph one and show it to me?" Yuuri hated anything troublesome because that meant he would need to be involved and he was all for detached interest. "I have never helped in a program before. Celestino decides all of that."

"Well I can definitely choreograph but at least choose a music for it." Victor stared at him looking doubtful and a bit irritated with his disinterest. Victor had always choreographed his own programs and had a music written for it.

"Oh well, okay." Yuuri could see there was no way out of it. He'll would have to at least choose the music he would be using. Just thinking about having to go through a list of songs made him exhausted.

"Think about it, okay? Please?"

"I will. Promise." He couldn't say no when Victor asked so emphatically. "Why don't you just coach me on jumps for now?" That should keep Victor distracted for now.

They spent the whole morning practicing Yuuri's jumps but he could barely manage a successful landing. And Victor had been pestering him about choosing a music all afternoon. 

~~~

Yuuri had been avoiding Victor all week. He didn't really want to have anything to do with creating a free program. His previous coach had tried to interest him in the creation of previous programs but Celestino got tired after a while. 

He decided to call his previous rink mate Phichit Chulanont. They were together in Detroit training under the same coach but Phichit decided to move back to his country in Thailand when Yuuri left.

"Phichit."

"Hey its been a while. What's going on with you?" Yuuri could hear the excitement in Phichit's voice and that made him smile. He should make more effort in getting in touch.

"Trying to choose a music for my free program. My coach is insisting I be involve in creating it."

"I've heard about Victor going to Japan to coach you. You've been following his career since you're a kid. So how does it feel working with him now?"

"He's demanding. Unlike Celestino who backs off when I said no, Victor pushes his way in." Celestino had known Yuuri's volatile temper. The man had seen it in action and knew when to leave him be. They had created a somewhat peaceful routine but he always knew how frustrated his coach was with his total half-heartedness. 

He heard Celestino's voice in the background. "Is that Yuuri?"

"Pass him the phone, Phichit."

"Yuuri," when his previous coach got on the line. 

"Hey, sorry I never got in touch with you." 

"Never mind that. How's your new coach?"

"Pain in the butt," he complained.

His former coach laughed at that but got serious after a while. "Yuuri, I hope you understand how your results would reflect in Victor's reputation. He was a great skater then a great trainer and choreographer but this is his first time coaching a professional. I know how much you hated all the fuss but this is not about just you anymore."

He sighed at that. He never really thought of it that way and he told Celestino as much. "He wants me to choose the music for my free program. And really, I'm trying but I can't seem to find a good one."

"I know. And you never will. Like you never did when you were with me. Because you have always known you could do better. Who else would provide a better music for your program than you, Yuuri?"

Phichit got back on the phone at that. "You can do it. You're a great composer!" 

"I know how much you hate personal but if you want a successful comeback then this have to be. Phichit has been making great progress and if you'll be as half-assed as you normally do then you won't get far."

~~~

He had been staring at the wall of his room since he hang up the phone after talking to his former coach. He had been wondering if what Celestino said was true that he would never be satisfied with a piece that other people wrote. It had been a while since he touched an instrument. 

When he was in Detroit playing the keyboard had been a passion for him. We was active with music clubs in college but after he lost control while on rehearsal due to pressure and fatigue he stopped. He resigned from the club and never touched an instrument again.

"I guess we'll just have to find out." He stood and came out of his room and saw Victor getting wasted with his father.

"Yuuri this drink is great," Victor raised a glass of what seemed to be soju to him.

"I'll be going out for a walk."

"Join us, Yuuri," his father invited as he poured more drink into Victor's glass. 

"I'm fine. Enjoy." He made his escape before his father could insist.

He was so nervous as he walked to the ballet studio where he used to practice. His mentor Ms. Minako opened the door after he knocked twice.

"Is your music studio still functional?"

~~~

Victor couldn't remember how many glass of soju they had consumed. Yuuri's father just kept pouring more whenever his glass was empty. He sobered a bit when Yuuri appeared from his room. His mate had been avoiding him since he insisted that he should be involved in creating his program. He knew Yuuri hated the idea but would not tell him why.

"He'll come around," Victor heard Yuuri's mother say.

"I'm sorry?" 

"Yuuri. He has this moments when he withdraws from people around him. Give him time to sort it out on his own then he'll tell you himself."

Victor smiled at that. He didn't know he was being transparent about his thoughts. "The wait is frustrating," he admitted.

"It is. But if you pushed him too much, he will just distance himself more."

"Auntie, you knew right? That I'm his mate?"

"We knew. His father too." Mrs. Katsuki turned to his husband. "Dear you need to sleep now. Let's go and let Victor rest as well."

"Patience. It goes a long way." Mr. Katsuki said as his wife pushed him towards their bedroom.

Victor was left alone and continued to finish the bottle they had started to drink. He was still there when Yuuri returned a few hours later. His mate placed a CD on top of the table in front of him.

"I'm still working on that. It's still not done. But you might like to listen to it so you could start the choreography." Yuuri left for his room without waiting for his response.

~~~

"Yuuri, let's go see the ocean," Victor announced when he barged in Yuuri's room. Victor dragged a disoriented Yuuri out of the house all the way to the beach. 

They sat beside each other on the sand facing the water. Victor let the silence stretch, he was hoping that Yuuri would talk first but no such luck. He sighed before facing the younger man. "You wrote the music."

"Yeah? What about it?"

"I didn't even know you play, much more compose."

"Well, it's been a while," Yuuri dismissed.

"Talking to you is like pulling out teeth," he was exasperated. 

Yuuri reached out to hold Victor's hand. He studied their laced fingers before looking his mate in the eyes. "I wanted you to choreograph something I made. I haven't touched an instrument in a while, you know. But I couldn't find anything so I wrote one."

"It'll be my pleasure to help with your free program."

"Your eyes are so light," Yuuri observed.

"Is it? Does it scare you?" Victor asked.

"You feel more dangerous. Like you're going to attack me anytime," he informed his mate. 

Victor felt a shiver ran through Yuuri. "Let's go," Victor stood up and pulled Yuuri with him.

"You can let go of my hand now."

"Nope, this is the first time you've touched me on your own so I'll hold your hand til we get back."

"It does feel different," Yuuri commented as he trailed after Victor.

"Well I'm sorry that my hands are not as delicate as your ex's hands."

"That's not what I meant and you know it," he rolled his eyes as Victor pouted. 

Victor sulked all day and kept on with comments about not being as petite as some other girl or how he wished he was a cute girl. 

It would have been entertaining but the constant pouting was getting into Yuuri's nerves.

"Would you stop that already?" He finally snapped as they were getting ready to leave the rink. 

Victor plopped beside him on the bench. "Sorry. I was just thinking you were probably closer to her."

"I'm like this even with my family. I know I'm always withdrawn and it's frustrating for you that I don't open up more. If it's any assurance I never did to anyone. Open up, that is." 

"I see."

"I'm trying. I'm just afraid that if I let my control slip even for a while, I would end up hurting you." He left Victor to pack all his stuff and get ready to go home.

Victor did the same in silence. He was lost in his thoughts. They left the Ice Castle without speaking further.

~~~

"Yuuri! The assignment has been announced," Phichit shouted from the other line. "See you at the China Cup!"

"I'll check it then. So we're together? That's amazing it's been a while and now we're competing." It was a good thing he got last year's Nationals championship even though he performed dismally on the Four Continents and the Worlds. That still qualified him for this year. 

"Yes. I'm excited for you to see my program. I forgot to tell you. It's choreographed by Chris Giacometti. Victor's boyfriend!" 

Yuuri struggled a bit when he heard that. He turned to Victor who was lounging on his bed with Makachin. "Okay, Phichit, I'll call you later." He faced Victor fully and waited til his mate looked at him properly. "You were harping about a girl I haven't been with for months! But you forgot to tell me you have a boyfriend?"


	8. The Cup of China Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As promised here's the second update for this week. How long do you think you can keep a secret? In my experience not for long. It'll find its own way out and then you won't have any control of the situation. And the burden will slowly eat you up inside.

"I'm meeting with Phichit tonight," Yuuri announced as he was unpacking in his hotel room. They took connecting rooms and Victor came over to his.

Victor walked over to his bed and sat on the edge. "It really amazes me how you're so close to him. Isn't he a rodent? Don't you feel aggressive when you're with him?"

"At first it was difficult. He was always scared that I'll just jump him or something. But after a while I got used to it and I'm able to control the urges better," Yuuri answered then turned to Victor fully. "What about you and your boyfriend. Isn't he a cat? Don't you feel like attacking him most of the time? Oh I'm sure you did attack him all the time since you've been together forever."

"Ex-boyfriend," Victor corrected. Yuuri started to turn away when Victor pulled him in an embrace. "You're the one I want to eat," he whispered, biting Yuuri's ear lightly.

Yuuri felt his face warming as he pushed Victor away. "Stop it." As he looked up he saw Victor's eyes were a light shade of gray. He stepped back and almost ran for the bathroom to escape.

Victor was amused by the younger guy's reactions but at the same time the close proximity aroused him. He took deep breaths to calm himself as he knew he couldn't do anything about his hard on. Not at the moment anyway.

~~~ 

"Vicky," Chris approached Victor's table outside the cafe he chose.

"Stop calling me that," he snapped at his friend as the guy took the seat opposite him.

"Touchy. What happened? Got kicked out of bed last night?" 

Victor wished that was the case because that would mean he was on Yuuri's bed before. He sighed as he took a sip of his coffee.

"So… no bed?" Chris raised a brow at him.

Victor shook his head.

"Wow. Nothing at all?" 

"Nope and stop asking about my sex life." Chris knew him well enough to understand the lack of sexual contact with his mate was grating on him.

"So what are you? Friends?" Chris asked doubtfully.

"I don't know, Chris. All I know is I don't want to push him." After what he did to Yuuri the least he could do was give his mate a choice from here on out. The situation was depressing but this way he could be with him and he got more hope of acceptance. He turned back to his friend who was studying him. "It's not that bad, really."

Chris continued to stare at him knowingly. "I know what your doing, Victor. It's your way of punishing yourself. Not that you don't deserve everything that's happening after what you did to Yuuri but this is not resolving anything. He needs to know."

Victor averted his eyes and didn't say anything.

"Victor?" His friend reached out squeeze his hand. "It's his right to know. Otherwise whatever you have will just be lies."

~~~

"Where do you wanna go anyway?" Yuuri met Phichit outside the hotel and they had been walking for a while.

"There's just a posh place here I want to check out." The other skater was excitedly taking pictures of almost every place they passed.

Yuuri forgot how easy going it was to be with Phichit. The guy was oozing with barely restrained energy. He let Phichit stop all he wanted, patiently following him. They would get to their destination eventually. Yuuri knew that this was Phichit's way of coping with the pressure of the up coming competition. Yuuri tended to withdraw when stressed but this friend would have to be on the move instead. 

"I'm so excited for you to see my program. It's something I mentioned to you before. Celestino said you told him about it so he got Chris to choreograph." Phichit stepped beside him and hid his phone as they continued walking. "I can't believe he's with Victor. Did Victor tell you stories about them?"

"They're not together anymore." He was irritated that his friend sounded so excited about those two. Victor already said that they broke up before his mate went to Hasetsu but still. They had been together for so long and it rubbed him the wrong way that someone else knew more about his mate than him.

"Celestino did say something like that," Phichit continued, missing Yuuri's expression. "But he also said they're working on it." The younger skater suddenly stopped. "Oh here we are. And look, Chris and Victor!"

Yuuri turned to see his mate with his ex boyfriend holding hands in front of a cafe.

~~~

'This is it,' Yuuri thought. 'This performance will make or break Victor's coaching career. People knows he's a great skater and choreographer but as a coach, I'll be the first.' He remembered what Celestino told him. 'It's not about just me. This will dictate both our careers.' Yuuri started his warm up. He was doing some stretching when he felt a hand squeeze his butt cheek. 

"Yuuri." He felt the person's breath near his ear.

He turned a bit to see a smirking Chris Giacometti. "Chris," he gasped.

"You're in good form. But I heard you haven't been taking care of your master's needs." He heard the guy click his tongue and raised a brow at him. "I can teach you the tricks he likes or…," he grinned at him, "I can just take care of him for you."

Yuuri felt a ringing inside his head at Chris' offer. He swatted the man's hand that's touching him. "I don't think my mate will appreciate your offer," he informed him and walked away.

Chris scratched his head as he watched Yuuri's back. The red glint on the younger man's eyes made him tremble a bit.

~~~

Yuuri would be performing next but he was not nervous anymore. His conversation with Chris drove all the nerves out of him and left a determination to show everyone just why Victor was with him. Victor chose to be with him and he would show everyone just how seductive he could be.

Victor saw the hard expression on Yuuri's face as his mate got ready for his turn. "Hey, Yuuri," he called. "About Chris…"

"Shut it," Yuuri growled at him. He stepped on the ice but turned back to lace his hand with Victor's. "Don't ever turn your eyes away from me." Then he moved away to start his performance. 

'I would show the rest of the world just how beautiful he is on the ice. Watch me. This is what Victor sees when he looks at me. And my charm will hold him forever.'

Victor felt something different in Yuuri's performance. The step sequence was more feminine and Yuuri's body moved in tune with the music, like his body was the music. It was a beauty, a sight to behold. His mate was seducing him and he was hoping he could convince him to follow through off the ice.

"Wow. He is really amazing. That amount of power… even from where I stand its drawing me in." He turned to see Chris focused on Yuuri as he took the last spin. 

"Mine," he said to the man menacingly.

Chris put up both his hands in mock surrender.

They both watched as Yuuri move towards them and stepped off the ice. The guy looked at Chris evenly. Chris whistled appreciatively at the younger skater. 

"You've definitely grown from the kid Victor first saw."

"What do you mean?" Yuuri asked and they both felt the danger laced in the question.

"Leave us, Chris. I think your new boyfriend is looking for you." Victor didn't take his eyes off his mate as he felt Chris leave. Yuuri was also studying him carefully. "Please, we need to hear the score." 

"Just when I thought I can trust you I find something more you're hiding from me." He left Victor without a backward glance.

~~~

Yuuri's performance was outstanding. It was definitely the best score he had so far. But he was not able to concentrate on that at all or even appreciate the achievement. It placed him on first place after all the other skaters were done with the short program. The interview with him and Victor came right after and it was already late when they came back to their hotel room.

Victor entered his room ahead of Yuuri and sat quietly on the sofa, head on his hands.

Yuuri closed the door behind him but didn't move into the room. "Talk. How long have you known about me? About us?"

Victor looked up but only stared at the wall in front of him. "Remember when you went to one of my competition and gave me flowers? Your scent. I haven't even seen you but your scent, it was intoxicating. Then I saw you after my performance and one look at you, I knew. I just know in my soul. You're mine."

Yuuri lowered his head as he listened to this. It was all so confusing. "Why? Why didn't you tell me? When you came to Hasetsu, you could've told me."

He finally looked straight at Yuuri. "What would you do? Would you listen? You were at your lowest and you were pushing everyone away. If I told you I was there as your mate you would've told me to get lost."

"When you first saw me, when I was a kid, what did you do?"

"What could I do? You were eight. You were a kid, Yuuri." He turned away again. "And I had Chris then," he added, barely audible.

"I see," Yuuri said, almost to himself. Victor heard his voice cracked. With a nod he walked to enter his own room through the connecting door and gently closed it.

Victor clapped his hand on his mouth to stop a sob from escaping. He tried to blink away the tears that was threatening. He heard a soft knock and the door opened as Yakov entered the room. His former coach sat beside him.

"Vitya, son, Chris told me. Asked me to come," he whispered, his voice full of sadness. "I'm really sorry that you're having such a hard time. Meeting your mate in your lifetime is very rare. Something that only a few was lucky to experience. So love him the right way. Do not make the same mistakes I did, Vitya. You will live to regret it and it will kill your mate." Victor heard how broken the older man was. "Do not make the same mistakes," he repeated with more force.

Victor broke down with that. As he sat beside the only father figure he knew as an adult, he cried so hard. The fear of what would happen if Yuuri learned of all the secrets he had been keeping came crashing down on him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you're curious about Yakov the story about him will be given when we reach Russia okay? Victor...oh well its not wholly his fault but he kept quiet about it so... Do you agree?


	9. The Cup of China Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapter is a bit short but it's a very important part of Victor and Yuuri's mating.

Victor didn't see Yuuri at all until the start of the free program performances. His mate looked distracted and tired, like he didn't get any sleep. As the other skaters started to perform, Victor felt Yuuri's rising panic. Without saying anything he dragged Yuuri by the wrist out of the room where all the skaters and coaches were waiting, to the parking lot where Yuuri won't be able to see or hear much of the performance.

"I approached you so I could help you." Victor started. "I really hated it when I heard you'll be quiting. I thought I'll be able to guide you back on your feet but if my presence is making it harder for you, I'll leave." It took everything in Victor to say the last piece but if that's what Yuuri needed then so be it.

Yuuri had his head down, he fisted his hands. "After pushing your way into my life? After declaring yourself my mate? Why? Why now?" His voice was dangerously low.

"I didn't mean to make this harder for you." Victor knew everything was getting out of hand between them but he wouldn't want him to be the reason why Yuuri would mess up this competition. Another loss and his mate would withdraw further and would be out of reach to him as well. All he hoped was that as long as they were both involved in skating they would meet somehow.

Yuuri finally looked up, red eyes flashed at Victor. "Hard? You know what's making this hard? You!" Yuuri couldn't stop the tears anymore. He cried for all the confusion he was feeling. "You're lack of trust. " He cried for the overwhelming lack of control. "You keep hiding things from me." He cried because he felt frustrated with himself and he felt betrayed by Victor. "You said I don't open up to you. But do you even tell me the important things about you? You're treating me like a bomb that's about to explode anytime. You don't trust me to handle myself!" He fisted Victor's collar and pulled the guy closer. "You don't trust me to able able to handle us!" 

Victor was helpless with the tears running down Yuuri's face. He gathered his mate in his arms and pulled him close. Yuuri buried his crying face on Victor's shirt. "I'm so sorry that you feel that way. I'm. So. Sorry." 

"Then tell me whatever it is that's making you seem so broken." Yuuri sensed that whatever it is that Victor was not telling him, was taking its toll on his mate. 

"No. Ask anything. Anything at all. Please Yuuri. I'm begging you. Not this." Victor felt so cold with fear that Yuuri would push the issue. But he really wanted to be honest to him as much as he could. "I don't want to lose you. You would hate me."

"You just told me your leaving though." Yuuri lift his head to see Victor fully. 

Victor cupped his face and wiped the tear stain with his thumb. "This is different. You'll surely hate me and leave me forever. I'll lose you forever."

"I'm your mate. I think that means you're stuck with me for life."

They both jumped when they heard the announcement of the second to the last performer. "It's time. Let's go." Victor ushered Yuuri, thankful that the guy wouldn't have time to inquire further.

~~~

They announced his name as he stepped on the ice. "Yuuri Katsuki! His song Yuri on Ice. Katsuki said that this year's theme is love."

Yuuri smiled to himself as he thought of Victor. It was amazing to know that even someone like him have insecurities. They were both scared of losing each other. What a couple they make. But he could also understand Victor's thoughts, he had not accepted the mating formally. He was doubting that he's ready for this. He knew it would be a big commitment but Yuuri thought he already jumped the gun when he accepted Yurio's challenge in Japan and won Victor as a coach. He sighed, he guessed his mate would expect something more definite from him.

The performance was going better than Yuuri expected. He was not feeling exhausted even with the lack of sleep. 

'What would be the best way to relay my feelings to Victor?' Yuuri knew there were still a lot of things his mate was hiding. And for his part he still felt lost and out of control but right at that moment Victor was something solid he could hang on to. Someone that would be constant whenever the storm was brewing inside him. He wondered what Victor would think if he changed his last quad from a loop to a flip.

He did just that and earned the shock of everyone that was watching especially Victor. He just hoped Victor got the message he was trying to convey, using his mate's signature move. His landing was not successful but there was enough rotation to it.

Something else happened the moment he landed, he felt a comfortable warmth starting from his feet and spreading rapidly through his whole body that when he ended the program he could feel his whole body glowing. Everyone was silent as they watched him and he saw Victor ran. He was confused but his body made the decision for him, he realized he was making his way toward Victor as well. 

Victor was so overwhelmed seeing Yuuri finally accepted the mating. That silver glow that was covering his whole body was testament enough to his mate's commitment and it filled him with a powerful urge to claim him in front of all this people. So he ran toward him, embraced him and for what felt like the first time in a very long time their lips met. It felt so right that he never let Yuuri go even as they stumbled and fell on the ice.

Victor let go of Yuuri's lips to look at him properly. "Thank you. I love you."

And Yuuri smiled up at him. He could hear the whole arena cheering them, he could hear them clapping and applauding them but his attention was only for his mate. Victor was looking at him with absolute joy and contentment. He decided he would deal with other issues in the future. For now he had Victor in his arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wonder when Victor will come clean. The more time passes I think the worse it will be.
> 
> There's a post China Cup next chapter, wonder what happened after the kiss. Hahaha


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And I'm back. Here's an early Xmas gift!! Enjoy it!!

Yuuri got the silver medal and his friend Phichit bagged the gold. All in all he was very satisfied with the results it could have been worse without Victor by his side. If he was being honest he wouldn't even be here if Victor was not with him. He already decided after the consecutive loss at the Four Continents and Worlds that he would retire, that was it he didn't want to live under all the pressure of competitive skating when all he wanted to do was be on the ice. 

When he was settled Victor came and forced his way in his life, claimed him as his mate. He was so doubtful at first, they were both male after all. Victor was a wolf and he was… well he was a beast through and through, a wild boar nonetheless. But today here he was accepting the claiming in a very public way. 

After the awarding they were attacked by reporters and fans as they left the arena. All of them asking for confirmation of the mating. They needed assistance from the security guards and most of the organizers to be able to make their way to the waiting car that would take them to the hotel.

When they arrived at the hotel though it was also full of people outside who seemed to be waiting for their arrival as well. Instead of stopping, the driver passed the hotel entrance and parked a block away.

"Mr. Nikiforov?" He was waiting for instructions as he obviously couldn't drop them off the entrance without causing some kind of commotion.

"Oh well Yuuri. Not that I don't appreciate that you've proclaimed yourself mated to me," he looked teasingly at the younger man who had been squirming since earlier. "You could've have done it in a more subtle way." 

"I didn't mean it to happen!" He protested, blushing furiously.

Victor laughed affectionately at Yuuri's reaction. It was really amazing to think that his mate would turn the table on him and claim him in front of the whole world. He turned to their driver who was waiting patiently. "There's an entrance at the back straight to the parking lot. It's for deliveries but I'm sure they can make adjustments for us."

Yuuri was sure it was mostly through Victor's charms that the people of the hotel let them get in through the back. He was so embarrassed as Victor walked with him holding his hands all the way to the elevator. "You can let go of my hands now. You don't have to do that with all those people staring. My God.." He wanted to disappear or at the least for the floor to swallow him.

"Hey. Don't be like that." Victor tagged him close and wrapped his arms around him. They were still embracing when the elevator opened on their floor. 

Yuuri was so thankful they didn't meet anyone else as they made their way to Victor's room. Yuuri found himself shoved against the door as it closed. 

"Hey mate," Victor looked down at him threateningly as he braced his arms on either side of him. Victor leaned down and tentatively touched his lips on Yuuri's. He was about to move away when Yuuri pulled him back by his tie and kissed him more heatedly. Victor gasped and Yuuri took advantage of it by slipping his tongue and tasting the inside of his mate's mouth. 

'Gosh', Yuuri thought fervently. 'But this feels familiar.' But that couldn't be as this is the first time this happened. He shook the thought and concentrated as Victor took the lead and devour him. Oh the things he could do with those mouth and that tongue. He didn't know how Victor maneuvered them to the bed because the next thing he knew was the other guy pushing him down the bed and he stumbled back on it.

Victor towered over Yuuri at the foot of the bed as he tagged his tie loose and started to unbutton his shirt. He watched his partner with intense gray eyes and saw the guy gulped. He smirked and joined Yuuri on the bed, shirt removed and proceeded to undo his pants as well. The thing was restraining his raging erection. He leaned over Yuuri's body hovering on top of him as he held both his hands on top of his head by the wrist. He saw the moment something changed in his mate. At first his eyes was glazed with desire then it went wide with fear. The next time he blinked Yuuri's eyes turned blood red and it was brimming with hatred. 

Victor was flipped to his back, feet dangling at the foot of the bed and now Yuuri was now on top, straddling him. His hands tight around his neck. He could feel sharp nails digging on his skin. It was getting harder to breath. Victor tried to scream Yuuri's name but no voice came out.

"Liar!" Yuuri snarled at him. "You're a liar!" Victor could hear the danger and anger dripping in his mate's voice. 

"Yuu…" he tried again. He tightened his grip on Yuuri's wrist the weaken the wild boar's hold. "Yuuri," he was able to croak out. Yuuri's eyes flickered black for a bit and he took advantage of that. 

Victor pushed his way up and pulled both Yuuri's arms on his back. The wild boar's spirit was on the surface again trying to struggle. Victor felt his sharp canine and bit Yuuri's shoulder with it. His mate trashed for a while until he sagged in Victor's arms. He tasted blood and saw it stained Yuuri's shirt. 

"Victor," he called weakly. His left shoulder felt like it's burning and his arms were sore. 

Victor buried his face on his neck, his whole body shaking. 

Realization came to Yuuri, the pain, the dizziness and not remembering anything. "Oh God, Victor? Did I hurt you?" He pushed Victor away to get a good look at his face. The guy looked devastated. The marks on Victor's neck were already fading but the blood on his lips and his canines were still visible.

Victor cut off whatever he was going to say by placing a light kiss on his lips. "Not your fault."

Yuuri smiled at the assurance even though he was pretty sure his coach was also shaken by what happened. He removed his shirt, it was stained by blood. He followed Victor's eyes on his shoulder, the bite mark there already fading. "It's healing." He looked up once again, willing the other guy to meet his eyes. "How does that work? I understand how it is when you're in a pack and you've given your allegiance to an alpha. The alpha has a hold on your actions because you've given permission to be ruled. But how is it with mates?" When Victor looked at him blankly, "You. Taming me."

"Ah. Well, whenever you fight me, it triggers my body to produce a hormone that when mixed into your blood pulls back the beast. Cages it, basically."

"Hence the bite?"

"Hence the bite," he confirmed.

Yuuri smirked at Victor. "It turns you on when I try to kill you?"

"Well, it sounds demented when you put it that way."

"So how are we going to do this? Because it seems like the beast fights back when being held down."

"We don't have to…"

Yuuri wrapped his hand on his partner's erection that's straining out of his boxers. He swiped the tip with his thumb. "I don't think so." Yuuri felt empowered at the thought of turning on this guy. The precum leaking from his cock made Yuuri's throat dry. "I want to. I want you to take me."

Victor moaned at Yuuri's touch pushing his hips up, into Yuuri's hand. He grabbed the other guy's hand to stop him from moving. "You can top me. That's fine."

"No. I'll be on top but I want you to claim me." He looked his mate in the eyes to make sure he understood. "I need this."

Victor studied Yuuri's face for a bit before nodding his consent. "Okay, let me prepare you." He reached for the packets of lube in his back pocket and applied it on his fingers and his cock. "Remove your pants." His mate obeyed, removed his boxers as well and came back to his lap right after, knees placed on either side of Victor's hips. He pulled Yuuri to kiss him again, he nipped at his lips and proceeded to suck on his throat. He slowly insert a finger in Yuuri's hole as he continued to kiss and lick on his shoulders, his nipples, his throat and back to his lips again. He added another finger and Yuuri buckled. He moaned and moved his hips to meet the fingers that were fucking him. Victor concentrated on widening Yuuri as he held himself back from the urge to just push him on his back and fuck him senseless like before. He would do it the right way this time.

"Now, Vic...," Yuuri gasped at him. "I need you." He reached to push Victor's pants and boxers down his hips. "Oh God, you're huge." He stroked Victor's cock as he spread the lube on his length. He kneeled in front of his mate as the guy positioned his cock on his entrance. He felt the head invade him and it made it harder to breath as he pushed down to accept Victor. "Hold on. Stop!" Yuuri screamed as he rapped Victor's shoulder to halt any movement. "Let me breath. Oh.. Wow I can feel you more when I breath." 

Victor couldn't help but laugh at Yuuri's expression as he tried to breath through his mouth. "That's not even half of me, love."

"Fuck, don't laugh!" He moved again until he was fully seated on Victor's lap again and his cock buried to the hilt. "Don't move! Gosh you're so big! Give me time! This is going to kill me." 

"You're really good for my ego, Yuuri." He slowly kissed his partner again as he guided Yuuri's hips to move up a bit and down again until they found a rhythm.

"Wait, you're not going to have a knot are you? Being a wolf and all."

"Don't be ridiculous! And start moving again or I'll throw you on your back." He gritted his teeth as he held himself back from the instinct to conquer Yuuri, he just tried to concentrate on the walls squeezing around him as Yuuri tried to get off. He lasted for a few more seconds before he pushed Yuuri down on the floor. He held his thighs apart and thrusted in him violently.

Yuuri found himself on the floor with Victor ramming in him. He met each thrust with his own as he tried to chase release. Victor's movement was getting erratic as he got closer but Yuuri was still itching. "More," he moaned as he met his partners eyes that was so light with lust. He felt Victor pulled out of him but before he could protest he rammed back and did it again and again. Yuuri arched against Victor's hips. He stared at Victor with red eyes flaring with hunger that was so overwhelming he was shaking. His mate leaned over him as he switched his movements to quick, short thrusts. He felt Victor's tongue on his shoulder as he licked him. Then we whimpered his release as his partner bit him. The pleasure of the release and the pain from his shoulder mixing as he shuddered under Victor who continued to ram in him filling him with his seed.

Victor collapsed on top of Yuuri but sensing that the younger man was having a hard time breathing he rolled to his side and gathered Yuuri in his arms. "I can feel my back bleeding. What did you do, claw it?" He could feel the sting on his back as he moved. 

"Sorry. I'll have handprints on my thighs, you know."

"Well love, unlike you, I don't heal as fast." 

With Yuuri's beast essence so close to the surface it would be easier for his body to draw strength on it in order to heal faster. "I'll still be sore even when the wounds heal, I can still feel the pain."

"Let's move to the bed then, the floor is hard."


	11. Rostelecom Cup

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry it took a while for this update I hope it's worth it. Enjoy.

Yuuri left Victor at the lobby of their hotel to deal with the reporters. 

Yuuri was dreading the Rostelecom Cup for more than one reason. He would meet Yuri Plisetsky for the first time since the competition in Hasetsu and his ex girlfriend, Sara Crispino would be here with his brother Michele. He never had the opportunity to talk to Sara after his mating with Victor became public. He was afraid of what her reactions would be. 

Damn it, he felt sore all over and his thighs and lower back was giving him hell. He should really learn to say no to Victor especially with a competition coming in. 

The elevator was closing when Yurio barged in. The elevator was already moving up when the younger skater turned to Yuuri and raised a brow in question. "You're moving funny." 

Yuuri blushed, not sure how to answer the other guy.

He might have picked up in his embarrassment. "Yuck. That's gross, pig!"

"Shut up!"

"Prepare to lose, pig. And tell your owner to keep it in his pants for now. It would be an unfair disadvantage when I win if you can't even walk straight."

~~~

"Let's get this over with," Victor announced as they walked towards the rink. He was waiving and smiling at the press people that were waiting. 

Yuuri turned to look at his mate, who looked as carefree as he normally did but he could feel the impatience underneath. One of the advantages of the mating was they could sense each other's state of mind. "What's going on with you?" He asked when they stopped beside the rink.

Victor avoided his gaze by crouching down to check on his skates, he tugged on the laces even though he already checked it earlier. 

Yuuri reached down to ruffle his mate's hair. "Hey," prompting him to look up.

"You kicked me out of your bed since we arrived…"

The admission made him smile. He pulled Victor to stand in front of him and embraced him, burying his face on his neck. He smiled to himself feeling reassured. He had been worrying to be honest, about how Victor would be coping with his request.

"Don't laugh."

"I'm not laughing," Yuuri denied but he chuckled softly. He released Victor as he heard the end of the previous performance.

"So are you ready to show your love to all of Russia?" Victor knew how much pressure Yuuri had been under knowing that he would be performing in Victor's country, in front of all the people who would be comparing him to his coach.

"Let's show them who your mate is then." 

Victor watched as the younger man stepped on the ice and turned to the audience. He felt so proud watching Yuuri conquer each performance and surpassing his own numbers each time. It was just a few more steps to the finals. He just knew they could make it.

"He's better than he was in China," Yakov observed as he stood next to Victor, his eyes also turned on the Japanese skater. Yuri Plisetsky on his side with his ex wife Lilia Baranovskaya.

"The performance has definitely evolved since I was in Japan." Yuri could definitely see that the program has matured with Katsuki. It gained an allure that was not there before. But the suppressed energy around the guy was more erratic than before. "Could you feel that?" He asked as he turned to his coach and mentor.

"The essence of the beast?" Lilia offered as she continued to study the skater on the ice.

"Vitya?" Yakov raised a brow at Victor in question. "Don't tell me you let him perform like that. With all this pressure of the competition, he would be like a time bomb."

Victor looked back at Yuuri, "he's more at peace than before, actually."

"You mean he got the beast under more chains. Caged further from the surface. That's not a solution at all. It'll only be a matter of time," Yuri spat at him as they all watched Katsuki finish his performance.

Victor moved to his mate as he was exiting the rink. He knew the internal struggle that might be happening with the guy as Yuuri himself accepted the mating but the wild boar inside kept fighting it. That part of Yuuri that knew about Victor, he had been dreading the day it won this battle and fought its way to the surface. 

~~~

Yuuri was quite satisfied with the results. It was better than he was expecting. After all the things he had been worrying about since he arrived it's a relief to learn that his practice came through. Victor excused himself right after the announcement of the scores. He was looking around to try to find where the guy went when he saw Sara walked towards him and gave him a tight hug.

"Yuuri! Look at you! You look well."

He smiled at her as she made him turn for her inspection. "Stop that," he protested as he laughed at her. Sara had always been more of a caretaker less of a girlfriend to him.

"What? I'm just happy to see you!" She slipped her hand around his waist and made him face his brother.

"You know you could've just told us!" 

Yuuri looked up to meet Michele's eyes that were looking at him with intense dislike.

"Mickey," Sara tried to make him stop.

"If you just told us about you and Victor right away, we would have understood. It's not like Sara will come in the way of you being with your mate." 

Yuuri was confused as he studied the siblings, trying to make sense of what they're saying. "I only found out about Victor when he came to Japan."

The other two exchanged gestures before turning back to Yuuri. It was Sara who spoke to him. "But your scent. It changed after Victor followed you that night when you left the banquet."

"You keep saying something about my scent. What exactly do you mean?" He was getting frustrated now. He had always known that Victor was hiding something from him. He was certain it had something to do with this.

"Oh Yuuri, you really don't remember?" Sara reached out to hold him on both arms.

Yuuri took a deep breath to steady himself. He shook his head at Sara, his eyes pleading for her to go on.

"Victor's scent," Michele said when Sara didn't continue. "You acquired Victor's scent with yours. That only happened after a claiming. He claimed you as his mate that night. I'm sure of it. Knowing you, especially when you're not yourself, you won't remember it." 

Yuuri could feel the spirit of the beast raging inside, clawing it's way out. He clutched at his head as he tried to fight the dizziness and the onslaught of headache that normally came with this episodes. "Why can't I recall this happening?" He said almost to himself. 

"Why don't you just asked Victor?" Sara offered as she tried to hold him up. 

"I doubt he'll say anything." 

Michele slipped his arm around his shoulders to help Sara keep him standing. "You have to find out though. I can feel you vibrating. It's the wild boar, it's not happy about something."

~~~

Victor came back and saw the Sara Crispino and her brother talking with Yuuri. He saw red haze when he realized that both of them had their arms around his mate. He marched faster towards them and yanked Yuuri out from between them. 

"Do not dare to touch my mate again!" Victor snarled at the other two skaters who were surprised by his arrival. He faced Yuuri who was straining against his hold. 

Yuuri was struggling to breath, he felt light-headed and he clutched at his chest as if trying to stop the beast from surfacing. 

"Yuuri?" Victor rubbed at Yuuri's back to try and calm him down but the other guy swatted his hand. His mate's defiance triggered his wolf to wake and he felt his teeth started to extend.

"Yuuri!" Sara attempted to approach them but was stopped by his brother who sensed Yuuri's volatile hold on himself as the Japanese skater held his head with both hands.

People around them was starting to notice the commotion when a pair of hand pulled Victor away from Yuuri. "Control yourself," Yakov hissed at him. Victor saw Lilia whisper something at his mate as she and Yuri Plisetsky, who arrived with them kept Yuuri upright.

"You forced a claim, didn't you?" Yuuri turned a murderous gaze at Victor. He could feel his tusks forming as he tried to fight his way through the haze in his mind and understand what Victor had done. "That's what you were so afraid that I will find. You forced a mating in me that night?" He could hear his voice was almost a growl as he started to transform. 

Victor snarled back and he was about to grab Yuuri when Yakov and Michele pulled him away. 

"Let him be, Vitya," Yakov said as they led him out if the venue. "You'll do something you might regret if we leave you together now."

"What would you want me to do? He'll leave me," he felt so cold as fear overcame him. Yuuri would not want to be with him after this. He needed to bind his mate with him so that he would not be able to escape.

"Stop that!" Michel's voice yanked him from this thoughts. "Do you really want to keep him that way?" 

Victor didn't realize he was voicing his thoughts.

"You should run, son," his former coach suggested. It was something he did to battle strong emotion and pressure when he was competing. It would be a good idea to calm down before he faced Yuuri again. "Lilia will take care of Katsuki for now."

And so he turned away, ran and let the freezing wind outside envelope me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Be assured I'm devising more heartaches for Victuuri, especially Victor.
> 
> Lilia's story on the next chapter peeps.


	12. Chapter 12

Yuuri woked up in an unfamiliar room. He hurt all over, every part of his body ached. He tried to look around but even turning his head caused pain. He racked his head to try and remember why he was here instead of his own bedroom. 

"You're awake. That's good." 

The woman who entered the room looked familiar but Yuuri couldn't place a name on her. He was sure he saw her with Yurio. Oh yeah, he remembered she took him away from Victor. He gasped as the name of his mate brought indescribable pain in his chest.

"Breath," the woman prompted as she took the chair next to the bed. "I'm Lilia. I'm Yuri's ballet trainer."

"Where is he?" There was no need to elaborate. 

"Yakov asked him to distance himself for now. You don't need him forcing his will on you when you're so out of control already." Lilia looked at him with so much understanding in her eyes. He really felt that on some level she knew what's going on inside his head.

"I feel disconnected somehow. Adrift. None of this feels real." He stared at the ceiling for a long time before speaking again. Lilia was waiting patiently. "I felt betrayed not just by Victor but by myself as well. Why can't I remember what happened?"

"It's your mind's defensive instinct. It's protecting you from the memories. From what I heard you already have tremulous hold on your beast spirit, that would probably break altogether if you learned of this earlier." 

"How do I deal with this? I don't think I can stay with Victor anymore. I can't even trust him." Mates were supposed to be forever but how would you keep to that when something this enormous happened? He couldn't even think of Victor without flinching. How could he stay with him?

"You won't be able to stay too far. Physical distance at an extended period of time will cause physical pain." Lilia leaned over Yuuri to help him sit up, propped his pillows before resuming her seat. The older woman looked kindly at Yuuri's pained expression. "It will be hard but you don't have to suffer unnecessarily. For now gather your thoughts then when you feel like you can face Victor, talk to him. He might have made a mistake and hurt you but he's your mate and would do everything for you. You'll have to know what you want, what you need and have the courage to ask for it Yuuri." She reached for his hand and squeezed it in support. "Don't settle for a mediocre situation. You'll regret it."

"You understand me. Why is that?"

She hesitated for a while as she stared back at Yuuri. It seemed like she decided on something as she sighed and settled further on the chair. "I was you. I was in your position before. That's why I know and I'm hoping you wouldn't make the same mistakes I made."

~~~

Lilia and Yakov had known each other since they were kids and found out that they were mates when they were still very young to know exactly what it meant. All they knew was they would be together forever.

They both pursued training in ballet until Yakov switched to skating as a teenager. They both had bright futures especially Lilia who was a prima ballerina as such a young age. Offers from outside the country kept coming to her but she stayed in St. Petersburg. She was happy being near her intended until an agent from Vienna came and offered her a place on the most prestigious stage.

It was a chance of a lifetime that would ensure the success of her career but it would mean distance from Yakov as he was training as well. Lilia was willing to make the sacrifice but Yakov won't hear it.

~~~ 

"Then what happened. Did you leave?" Yuuri asked, curious as to how this story was connected to his.

"He forced his claim on me. I'm his mate after all," Lilia answered with voice heavy with years of sorrow. "We decided to wait on the mating and our families agreed. But when he realized I'll push through with leaving him even if he didn't agree, he claimed me. And that's the end of any thoughts of Vienna. Mates couldn't live apart. It would have killed us both if I left."

"I've never been away from Victor since he came to Japan." It had only been months since then but just the thought of not being with his mate was causing a painful clenched in his chest. He knew that mates couldn't be apart for extended period of time as the absence would result to physical pain. It had been known that when a mate died the other one never lived that longer without his other half. 

"I stayed," Lilia continued "for over a year I tried. But I felt lost. As you said, disconnected from my life. I was depressed and I wanted to get away. I escaped the only way I thought possible that time." She showed her wrists to Yuuri and there he saw the scars from what she did.

"Oh God," his eyes wide with shocked as he traced the fading lines on her wrists. How bad was it, that she tried to take her life just to get away?

"Yakov found me in time. It was reported though and the Agency for Mating Affairs intervened. They offered a way out of the mating."

"What did Yakov do?"

"He approved for the mating to be dissolved. And the agency gave me a medicine that would lessen the pain of the separation. We still need to see each other but no more than once of twice a year. He was so guilty of what happened I didn't pursue a case against him anymore. I'm finally free of him to follow my dreams. It didn't happen immediately though. I still need to get better in here." She pointed at her temples. "Depression. It took me another year before I left for Vienna."

"Are you together again?" 

"In a way. We don't live together but we are committed. We came to an agreement some years ago." She took his hands in her and looked him deep in the eyes. "Talk to Victor then think about yourself. What kind of life do you want to live? Because if you're going to decide from what you're feeling right now you'll regret a lot of things. Our ending might be bittersweet but our mistakes brought Yakov and me to what we are now. It's not much but it's something and we're together still." 

Lilia left Yuuri to his thoughts, which are depressing to say the least. He was wondering if he could do it. Forgive Victor and move on, stay mated to him. Could he still live his life with him? He didn't think so but he also didn't want the idea of being separated from the guy. If only he could remember the events of that night. Maybe it would give him the answers that he needed. 

~~~

Yakov found Victor seated at a secluded area of the lobby. He approached the guy, who had his head bowed and took the seat next to him.

"How is he?" Victor asked as he recognized the person next to him. 

"Sleeping. Lilia was with him earlier. What about you?"

"Yuuri's parents asked me to let him be for now. So I'll be leaving him here to finish the competition and head back to Japan. I was hoping you'll agree to stand as his coach tomorrow." 

Yakov was shocked to learn that Yuuri's parents would still welcome Victor with them after what happened and he said so to the younger man. 

"They treat me as a son. They're angry but they won't turn me away." Victor gave his mentor a timid smile.

Yakov clapped Victor's shoulder as he assured him he'll take care of Katsuki. "Don't worry about him. I'll make sure he's ready for tomorrow and we'll drive him to the airport after." The Russian coach stood and left immediately after that. 

Now Victor would have to just wait for what Yuuri would do. He was so scared his mate would resort to dissolving the mating but if it really came to that then he would accept it. Yuuri would still be forced to meet him somehow and he could take advantage of that to get him back. 

He took his phone out and dialed Chris' number. His best friend would keep him grounded so that he wouldn't give in to the urge to tear this building to pieces and get to his mate.

Chris picked up after a few rings. "Hey, how's Russia?"

There was silence as Victor tried to gather his thoughts and find a way to tell his friend what happened. 

"Vic?" The voice sounded worried now as he kept silent still.

"He found out," Victor sobbed on the phone, the tension of the last few hours catching on him. 

"Oh Vic, I'm so sorry." Chris wished he could reach through the phone and gather the guy in his arms.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're nearing the end of the journey. Few more chapters to go. Is it going to be a happy ending? I wonder...

Victor already went back to Japan and Yuuri was left with Yakov to finish the last part of the competition. Victor called before he boarded the plane to say goodbye. Yuuri remembered that conversation, Victor's voice, normally so cheery, sounded so lost and his heart ached for both of them. 

He understood on some level that it was not fully Victor's fault not in the way Yakov pushed Lilia to mate with him. But what hurt more was that he never told Yuuri about it. He kept what happened to himself and he just felt so betrayed. 

~~~

"Hey," Yuuri said on the phone when he picked up Victor's call for the first time since he learned about the truth of their mating. He had ignored Victor's attempts to see him and left his messages and his calls unanswered.

"Hey," Victor answered tentatively. 

Yuuri heard the regret in his voice and fought the urge to comfort him. He couldn't do it, he couldn't reach out to his mate when he himself felt so devastated. "You're in the airport?"

"Yeah we're about to board the plane."

"I see…," There was an awkward silence as they both wait for the other to speak.

"I'm so sorry," Victor finally said after what seemed like a long time. 

"I know," he assured him. It was true, he knew how sorry Victor was. He saw it in his eyes whenever he looked at him even before he knew the reasons behind the guilt, he felt it. "I just wished you're honest about it from the start."

"I'm sorry," Victor repeated like he hoped it would make a difference.

"Who else knew? Other than Yakov."

"Chris, he figured it out when I came to Japan and I just have to tell someone or the guilt will eat me whole. Yakov learned about it when we were in China."

"I see. You're really close to Chris even now." He thought it would kill him to acknowledge that his mate was closer to someone else than him but it was true and there layed another insecurity that he had. 

"No. Its not like that. My relationship with Chris was not romantic, we both travelled a lot so it's easy to take other lovers and we did when we're not together. It's different from what we have." 

"Why me then?" 

"What do you mean?"

"I'm sure I'm not the usual type that you go for when you take a lover." 

There was another silence on the line that confirmed what he said. He realized how experienced Victor was after the first time they slept together and he was certain that he took lovers that were experienced as well. "I just wanted to know how much of this is about the mating and how much is about us?"

"Yuuri, you know I love you, right?" Victor pleaded.

"I don't know," he cried. "I don't know. I wish I know what to believe so it wouldn't hurt so much." 

"I do. I love you so much. Please believe me."

Yuuri dropped the phone on the bed as he covered his face with both his hands and broke down. He let the tears flow freely and he hoped that it would take the heartaches with it.

Victor continued to hold the phone and listened to Yuuri sobbing. 

~~~

Now for the first time since they were together Yuuri would be performing without Victor. He felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to see Yakov.

"You ready?" 

"Yes, as ready as I'll ever be."

"Do not let all your hard work go to waste. Once you're on the ice free your mind," Yakov told Yuuri as he prepared to get on the rink.

Yuuri nodded, his eyes looking ahead. This might be the last time he would be competing if he wouldn't qualify for the finals. He stepped on the ice and let the music take over. 

"Yuuri on Ice" was a program made by him and his mate. It was something they had together, it bound them in the way a forced mating could not do. Their talents and their minds brought together to create a beautiful show about struggle, about being lost and finding ones way home. 

He stumbled on a jump as his mind went in circles of about Victor, about his career and his sanity. 'What is the right path,' he thought. 

~~~

"The results are better than I expected," Yakov told him as they sat together for the announcement of scores. 

"Are you happy?" He blurted out without thinking.

"Why did you asked?" The older man looked at him curiously, sizing him up.

"You're not really together."

"We are though. Each person has a different happy place, son," he answered as he stood and left Yuuri.

He came in fourth place, barely qualifying for the finals. He didn't realize just how much he wanted to continue competing until he felt the relief from the results.

Yuuri was standing just outside the rink when Yuri, who bagged the silver medal, rushed to him. "Idiot! What was that jump?! What will you tell your owner if you didn't make it?" 

"Yurio--"

"Not just because your owner is not here you can fail," the younger man berated.

He didn't get a chance to answer when Jean-jaques Leroy, who got the gold medal, joined them putting his arm around Yuri.

"There you are, Yuri. I was looking for you. Want to see my gold medal?" The guy flashed them with his arrogant smile. He turned to Yuuri like he just noticed him there. "Katsuki, you almost didn't make it."

"Can you stop talking," Yuri spat. "Don't you get tired of hearing your own voice?"

"Hey, don't be cold." 

Yuuri left the two and slipped out of the venue quietly. He wasn't due at the airport until early tomorrow morning so a walk might be a good idea. He would meet Victor tomorrow but he was still not any closer to an answer. All he knew for sure was that he wanted to go to Barcelona with Victor. Maybe that was the answer.

He wandered around the area of the hotel as the snow fell down and that's where Yuri found him late that night. "Where's JJ?"

"Lost, I hope or better yet dead," his voice full of venom.

"What's up with you two?" Yuuri was sure there's something going on, he just couldn't put his finger on it.

"Nothing," he answered guiltily.

"You're a dismal liar."

Yuri had the gall to blush at his comment. 

He shook his head as he realized something. "He's engaged. Be careful or you'll get hurt."

"It's nothing really. He's just bored," the younger skater denied. 

"Yeah? What about you?"

"Don't you have your own problems to worry about?"

Yuri was obviously avoiding the issue so he sighed and kept his mouth shut. They were quiet for a while staring at the darkness when Yuuri spoke again. "What's your happy place?"

"My what?" Yuri looked up at him, confusion clear on his face.

"Something Yakov said," he explained. "About each one of us has a different idea of a happy place." 

"I just want to be in the middle of the podium." 

~~~

Yuuri approached his waiting mate tentatively. The guy had his head down as he sat on one of the long chairs. Victor didn't see him until he was standing right in front of him. 

Victor lifted his head immediately when he felt his presence. There in front of him was the guy he had been waiting for. His heart squeezed at the sight of his mate. He looked tired and sleep deprived. He stood and gathered Yuuri in his arms, burying his face on his shoulders. "Yuuri."

"Hey, I'm home."

"Yeah. That's right," Victor seemed lost for words as he clung to Yuuri. "Yeah, welcome home."

"I don't know what this means," he warned Victor. "But I'm here."

Victor let him go to touch his cheek with his palm. "That's okay. I'll accept everything you're prepared to give. Anything at all, Yuuri." 

He leaned into his mate's touch. 'It's been so long since he felt his touch,' he thought. 'Or at least it felt that way. Even though it's just a couple days ago.'

"Let's go then. We still have a finals to prepare to." Victor twined their hands together as they walked out of there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me what you think of the pliroy sequel?


	14. Chapter 14

Barcelona, Spain

"Just as I thought. You're here," Chris called out to Victor as he entered the area of the swimming pool. "You either run or swim when stressed."

Victor surfaced to see Chris with only a skimpy swimming trunks. "Care to join?"

They did a few laps before settling on the benches beside the pool. Chris brought a bottle of wine with him and two glasses. They drank in silence, letting the drink warm then against the cold weather. 

"He forgave you then?" Chris asked when he figured Victor was not going to start to talking.

"Not really," he answered vaguely as he stared down at his glass and swirled the liquid in his glass. "He's willing to try and give me another chance but he kept flinching whenever I approach him." He sighed and drank the rest of the wine. "I love him more for trying to work it out with me but I can see it's taking so much from him."

"So what are you going to do?"

Victor shook his head at Chris. "I don't know. I want to hold on to us but if it's going to destroy him then I would let him go." He smiled at Chris' doubtful look. His friend knew how lonely he had been even when they were together. After the death of his parents, he never felt like he belonged somewhere even when he was with Yakov. The old man took him in, trained him and treated him like a son but he knew there's a distance between them. Same when he was with Chris, it was convenience and comfort that drove them together and even then they were not exclusive to each other. He was tired of roaming around as a lone wolf when he found his way back to Yuuri. His mate now an adult, it would have been perfect if he wasn't so weak. Yuuri's family welcomed him like a true son even after they learned about what he did. He knew deep down that at the end of the day even if he would not be with Yuuri he had a place with them.

"Victor?"

"I need to get back to Yuuri. He was still sleeping when I left he's probably looking for me." He stood and made his way back to their hotel room.

~~~

Yuuri woke up alone in the hotel room he shared with Victor. He felt uneasy with the absence of his mate. Victor suggested for them not to resume any sexual relationship while Yuuri prepares for the finals. He knew he was not ready so he readily agreed but he still craved Victor's nearness.

He heard the door open after a few minutes of sitting on his bed staring at the wall. His mate came in with a big towel covering him. "Where have you been?"

"I was with Chris on the pool," Victor shrugged the towel which only left him with his trunks on.

"With Chris? You always go to him. At a small sign of trouble you always run back to him," Yuuri's voice rising as he stood and approached Victor.

Victor stood very still as he felt his mate's temper getting out of control, he wouldn't want to spook him with any sudden movements. "It's not like that at all."

"It is like that! Don't you see how much I hate seeing you with him! And you call him so often too! Your relationship with him is the biggest insecurity I have about us and you go and what?! Hang out with him?"

"Yuuri please, you're my mate," Victor insisted trying to stop himself from shouting.

"What does that mean anyway? I wanted to know. I wanted to be sure you love ME," Yuuri pleaded. "Not just because I'm your mate but because I'm ME! Is that so hard to understand?"

Victor held Yuuri as he guided them to sit on the bed. "I love you. It might have started because of the pull of being your mate but every time I'm with you Ifall in love with you. Your temper. Your awkwardness. Your every expression. Your everlasting avoidance of anything troublesome. You. Yuuri Katsuki. I love you."

Yuuri turned and looked Victor in the eyes. Victor was not sure what his mate saw as he sighed and stood up. "Let's go sightseeing," he said and closed the door of the bathroom behind him.

 

~~~

"When I said sightseeing, I didn't mean buying everything on sight," Yuuri grumbled as he slumped on a bench near one of the shop they just came out from. Victor took the seat next to him and he shoved all the numerous shopping bags on his lap. "You bought it, you carry all of it."

"That's not even most of what I wanted to buy for you since you keep grumbling about spending." 

"It's almost your birthday," Yuuri said and glanced at his mate who was looking around probably looking for something more to buy. "What would you want to get?"

Victor turned to hold Yuuri's hand. "I already got what I want."

He could feel his face burning as Victor stared at him with those grey eyes. "Well… I mean, other than that! Of course!"

Victor chuckled as he withdrew his hand from him. "I don't know. I really don't celebrate it."

"Let's go then." Yuuri stood and walked towards the other shops they had not seen. He was not sure what to get Victor but it had to be something good. He knew his mate was having a hard time dealing with the lack of sexual contact and he was so thankful for him that he was not forcing the issue. He would like to give him a gift that would assure him Yuuri was giving their union a real chance. He would like to express his commitment to them even through all his doubts. 

After walking around for more than a few blocks he motioned Victor to an elegant looking jewelry shop. 

"Why here?" Victor followed him inside, confused as he looked around the store.

Yuuri didn't answer as he perched on the glass display. He checked some of the rings with a simple design hoping to find something that would fit Victor's personality. He waited until Victor wondered further into the shop before pointing to a pair of ring that had a design engraved on the inside. The man in the counter took it out for him to inspect closer. 

"The design forms a snowflake when you put them together like this," he told Yuuri as he put the ring on top of the other. It did show the outline of a lone snowflake that looked very intricate.

"I'll get this. Thank you." He handed his card for the guy to process his purchase.

Victor strolled back to Yuuri when he saw him signing the receipt. "You found what you want?"

Yuuri beamed a smile at him a nodded as he took the bag and led him out of the shop. "Let's go back to the cathedral."

~~~

They were standing just outside the Barcelona Cathedral when Yuuri took out the box and opened it for Victor to see. Victor was caught of guard by the sight of the ring that Yuuri was holding. He couldn't believe what his mate was thinking. He couldn't dare to hope for the meaning of this gesture. 

"I know our relationship hasn't been at its best for a while and I know for a fact that I'm not ready for a lot of things. That there's still a lot inside of me that I need to sort out. But while I do that I don't want to lose you to all these doubts. I want you to be assured of my commitment to our mating. I can't promise much of anything right now but one thing I can tell you for sure is that I'm yours, forever." Yuuri took Victor's right hand and slipped the ring on his finger. "Say something please."

"Oh yeah," Victor tried to rack his brain for something to say. He was so amazed at this new development and he could feel the burn on his hand where the ring is. "I know how difficult it has been for you and all I offered you were excuses and apologies. I'm so happy that you're still able to give yourself to me after all that has happened." He sighed before he took Yuuri's hand to put the the other ring on his finger. "I can't describe how happy I am when I saw you again on that video of you doing my program. It's like you were calling to me and I have to answer by going to you. So even through all the doubts and the guilt that was consuming me I went to Japan to be with you. I didn't dare to hope for much other than to be your coach and maybe a friend. But when I had you near me I became selfish I want everything. I want you as my mate. Tied to me forever. It was like living in hell fearing that I'll be losing you because of my weakness that night." He pulled Yuuri in an embrace and he let the scent of his mate assure him of their love even though Yuuri never really said the words. "Now, all I want is for you to be okay, for you to be happy."

They held each other like that for a while as they try to prolong the moment.

~~~

Yuuri was walking back to the hotel with Victor when he noticed Yurio inside a restaurant with Otabek Altin. Victor stopped next to him and saw what he was looking at.

"Wow, since when has that been going on?" Victor asked as he tried to catch Yurio's attention.

Yuuri dragged Victor away before they were noticed. "I don't know really but let them be. I'm just glad it's not JJ."

"JJ?" Victor straightened himself and looked curiously at Yuuri.

"I'll tell you next time."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope I did justice to this very important moment for Victuuri. I was thinking of a different design of the ring but I think it's perfect as Kubo-sensei made it. What's your favorite part in this episode?   
> Mine is when Yuuri learning about the banquet!!


	15. Chapter 15

Yuuri knew he failed. Even before he landed he realized he would not get the full score of the jump and for that it was almost impossible now to get the gold medal. He kept his head low as his mind tried to process the results. He needed to stand up and thank the audience, his fans. He forced himself to do so and faced them. He waved to them as the tears of the defeat ran down his face. 

Victor saw the defeat on his mate's eyes as the scores were announced. He put his arms around him as he continued to cry following the results. He held the hand that has his ring on it and enclosed it in his, trying to lend him his spirit. They had come this far and they both knew how this would put him further from the rankings. Victor didn't want to think what would happen from here. 

Yuuri heard the commotion near them as people saw and realized they were wearing the same ring. They were clamoring for details and Victor fended them with the finesse of a pro. He looked up where he was seated to find himself eye to eye with Yurio. The other guy averted his gaze as he entered the rink.

~~~ 

"Hey pig!" 

Yuuri stopped at the hallway to see Yurio running towards him. The younger Russian skater gave yet another amazing performance, placing him ahead of the other skaters. Instead of stopping, Yurio dragged him down the hallway by the wrist. "Where are we going," he shouted after Yurio.

"Just come with me I need an escort," as he continued to pull Yuuri. 

"Escort where?" 

"I just need to speak some sense in him. That was a stupid performance and you know it!" 

Yuuri realized he was talking about JJ. The guy's score definitely suffered after all the slipped. "I told you not to involve yourself with him."

Yurio turned back to raise a brow at him. "When did I ever listen to you anyway?" He stopped in front of one of the rooms on their right but didn't enter. "I'll just talk to him."

Yuuri sighed as Yurio released his arm. "Fine. Go on I'll wait outside. That way when I say I don't know what's going on I won't be lying."

Yurio nodded at him before pushing the door open and leaving him outside. He closed it after him and leaned back on it. He was amazed at how Yurio take on life. He conquered every challenge with the vigour of a grown man but never loses the wonder of a child. He mostly just ignored the norm if it's against what he felt was right for him. And most of all he knew who he was and held on to that firmly. Others might call it selfish but at least he knew he would never have any regrets. 

What exactly did he want to do from here, he wondered. He had been feeling detached from his own life, like someone looking in but was not really part of it. 

"What are you doing here?" 

Yuuri looked up to see Victor still in his suits. "I was just waiting for Yurio."

He looked confused as he saw his mate was leaning on a closed door and he was hearing hushed voices from inside. He didn't have a chance to ask further as JJ's girlfriend walked up to them. 

"Have you seen JJ?"

"Yeah…"

"No!" Yuuri interrupted before Victor could respond properly. "He just left actually and went that way."

Isabella thanked them and went to the direction Yuuri pointed to.

Victor on the other hand gave his mate a critical eye as he asked for details without speaking.

"Well, let's just say we don't want Isabella finding JJ right now. Let's get out of here." 

Victor let his mate push him but he would definitely ask for details.

~~~

Yuuri had been dreading this moment. It would have to be done though or they would just be going round in circles pretending everything was fine. He owed it to himself and to Victor as well, he would have to set things right or they would not get anywhere near where they wanted their relationship to be. 

Victor sat in front of him drying his hair after taking a bath. "Okay, so what do you want to talk about?"

"I'm sorry but I can't do it anymore." He felt his eyes burn with the tears threatening to flow. He sniffed before speaking again. "I couldn't live with being JUST your mate. When we started this my goal has been so clear. But everything's so muddled I don't even feel like myself anymore. Somewhere along the way I've lost Yuuri Katsuki."

"I don't understand," confusion was clear in Victor's eyes as he stared back at Yuuri. "I thought we're okay?"

"That's what I thought too or that's what I was hoping for." He smiled bitterly at his mate as he clutched his chest with one hand. "When was the last time you sensed my beast?" Yuuri saw the instant it dawned on Victor. "I couldn't feel it anymore. The presence of the wild boar had always been strong but since I came back to Japan it's been getting weaker until after we arrived here in Barcelona. Now there's nothing, like I don't have my essence anymore. I feel so disconnected from everything."

"Yuuri," Victor could see how hard it was for his mate. He couldn't believe he missed something so crucial. There had always been a strong aura when he was with Yuuri and he just thought that finally the beast was accepting him. But it looked like that was not the case, the beast had hidden itself deeper in Yuuri. 

They spent the night curled up together as they both braced themselves for the coming changes.

~~~

Rumor had it that the happy couple was spending time together that was why Yuuri Katsuki did not make an appearance in the morning practice. 

Yuri Plisetsky thought otherwise when he saw Victor outside alone. The grey wolf was staring far away and did not even glance his way when Yuri approached. "You do realize all this talk about commitment is bullshit, right? He's not even stable to be thinking about anyone other than himself."

Victor gazed at Yuri. "What do you want," he snarled.

"He's not okay at all," Yuri spat back.

"Are you challenging our mating," Victor asked evenly his eyes not wavering from Yuri's.

"That's all you're thinking of!" Yuri shook his head slowly at the older man. "Your mate! Your mate is a person! Do you even see him as Yuuri Katsuki?"

Victor clenched his fist tightly hearing the familiar sentiment from the other guy. "I didn't know you care? You don't even see him as a friend."

Yuri knew they were not exactly bosom friends but Yuuri Katsuki cared for him. "Maybe not but he thinks of me as a friend and I would like to make sure that he's not doing something stupid, something that will destroy him. You're cruel and selfish! You don't fool me. All you want is a mate. I know you Victor, I know how much you've been waiting for this all your life. I'm sure you would do anything to keep it even at the expense of someone else."

"You don't know what your talking about," Victor murmured as he turned his back to Yuri.

"Really," he called after him. "Then tell me if not for the mating do you think Yuuri would even consider staying with you after you raped him?"

"Shut up!" Victor lunged for Yuri's neck, his sharp nails grazing the delicate skin. He caressed his thumb over Yuri's pulse. "Keep your opinions to yourself if you want to keep breathing, little cat."

~~~

Yuuri stepped once again on the ice. This would be his last performance if he decides to retire. He took a deep breath and called upon the spirit of the wild boar sleeping inside him, hidden beneath all the barriers he built in himself. There was still silence but he could feel something, something stirring. That would have to do for now. He glided on the ice, calling on years of experience, the accumulation of all his struggles and heartaches, of all the happiness and small victories, of the loneliness and the mating. As he made his last spin he could see people on their feet, clapping their hands and celebrating with him the performance of his life. He could see Chris clapping standing next to his friend Pitchit, who had tears in his eyes. Sara was wiping his eyes as well with Michele by her side. Yurio, Yakov and Lilia was standing on the side of the rink looking proudly at him. Finally he turned to Victor who was beaming at him with so much love and acceptance. He knew right then and there he would need to start healing not only for him but for this man. They owed it to each other. 

~~~

"I really wanted that gold medal, Yuuri," Victor grumbled. Yuuri was packing his things as his mate complained about Yurio getting the gold medal. He took the silver medal that Victor was looking at to secure it in his bag.

"Well, I can't help it that I was up against a monster now can I?" He looked up when Victor didn't answer and he found his mate studying him.

"You know that space you're talking about? Let's do it."

He stared at his mate for a while certain that he misheard him. "You're sure," he confirmed.

"I am. I think you're right. We need this. We need to heal. And I really need you to come back to me on your own when you're ready. I need to know you want me too. I know it's a selfish reason but I won't be able to move forward any other way. Same way you need to assure yourself that I see you more than just my mate but you as a person." Victor grasped his hand and pulled him forward. He captured Yuuri's lips in his as he tasted him, trying to memorize his essence. He sucked at his tongue, devouring him.

They surfaced when they needed to breath. Yuuri cupped Victor's face in his palm. "We'll be fine. I might need to find myself out there but I'm still your mate and nothing I find will change that. I'll make my way back to you. Just please, wait for me."

Victor reached up to clasped Yuuri's hand in his. "As long as you come back it doesn't matter how long. I'll wait. You're place is here with me."

Yuuri let the tears fell down. They needed this, some time apart but knowing that did not make it any easier. This man had been waiting for him for a long time now but he was asking him to wait longer and for that he loved him all the more. "I love you, Victor."


	16. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We've reached the end of this journey I really appreciate everyone who kept up with me in the last months. Thanks for your time. Til next time.

Victor accepted Otabek Altin to coach him and they made Hasetsu Ice Castle their home rink. After so much planning with Yuuri before they parted in Barcelona, it was decided that his mate would take Yakov and Lilia's offer to train him. So he went to Russia with Yuri. 

Yuuri's parents asked him to come back and use the house they were going to give them as a mating gift. Now he was living here with Otabek. It had been a few months with minimal communication from his mate. He heard Yuuri took to traveling alone but mostly visited friends he met while competing. The last he heard he was with Sara visiting Seung-gil in Korea and that was a few weeks ago.

"You should just call him," he heard Otabek say as the guy crossed the living room to the kitchen.

"I can't."

"This arrangement doesn't mean you'll be estranged." His housemate came back from the kitchen and took the chair opposite him placing a pitcher of juice and a couple of glasses on top of the table.

"I know, I know. But knowing me if I start I'll keep bothering him and where will that leave us?"

"Back to square one," Otabek offered.

"Exactly!"

They were silent for a while when someone knocked at the door and Otabek stood to see who it was. 

After the GP finals they sat down and talk, really talk for the first time since they were together. They shared their expectations and insecurities. It was hard at first to admit that love and mating was really not enough to sustain a healthy relationship. Yuuri had been drifting further away with the lost of his beast essence. He would need to reacquaint himself with it before he could commit to Victor. 

Victor for his part would need to learn to forgive himself. At first he wasn't sure he could do it. He was not able to admit even to himself what he did to Yuuri that first night. But to accept the responsibility and move passed it he needed to face it so he did. He told Yuuri exactly what happened that night, how he wasn't able to stop even after Yuuri begged him to. He admitted how scared he was to learn what he was capable of.

Yuuri for his part tried to be honest that it would be hard to forgive but he loved Victor enough to try. It's not much but it was a good start for them.

Otabek came back with an envelope and handed it over to him. "From the Mating Affairs."

He opened it to see official mating registration documents signed by Yuuri with a small post-it note on top. 'File it. Are you ready for me to come home?'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As much as I would like to end it in a brilliant "they lived happily ever after" it wouldn't be realistic after all they've been through but I'm hopeful as Victor is. Thanks again. Tell me your thoughts.


End file.
